Chapter Sixteen: Last Chance

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"there were three reasons I was scared to let people in;

the damage that they could do,

the damage they could find,

and the damage I could do to them."

___

Elsea groggily blinked awake as Ever shoved her shoulder. Not Ever, she corrected herself angrily. Sessy undied her restraints and they began walking again, Elsea's feet dragging with exhaustion. He produced some dewberries, which she gobbled down eagerly, the fruit dyeing her fingertips. The last time she'd eaten them felt like a lifetime ago. But somehow not much had changed. Elsea was going back in time, all the way back to the beginning. 

Elsea entertained herself by telling the guards a story that sounded like gibberish to her. Nevertheless, they seemed to genuinely be interested, if only to pass the time.  At first they acted annoyed, but their boredom got the better of them.

"Shink!" Elsea yelled, and the guards jumped. In a low, eerie voice, she continued. "An arrow cleaved his flesh apart, tearing past organs and tissue. Guts and clumpy blood gushed out of the gaping hole in his chest, tubes of-"

"Stop it!" Sessy squealed squeamishly, clamping hands over his ears. He didn't bother prodding Elsea along anymore. She considered making a run for it, before deciding against it. There was no use. While they were laughing and leaning in to hear the rest of the story, Elsea thought she heard a crunch. Just once, behind them. 

After the gory story was finished,  the guards took a water break to drink some river water. Elsea was tied up against a tree, unguarded. They splashed and dunked one another, laughing in a carefree way she envied. Their attention directed elsewhere, Elsea tested her bonds for weakness. Fra had done a careful job with the knots, and it pressed tightly against her skin.  She wriggled up and down to loosen it, and it scratched against her persistently.  No matter how hard she strained, it didn't give. Their enjoyment teared at her and Elsea fought the tears of frustration. Why couldn't she live a normal life? 

Helplessness was not a stranger. 

"Elsea." A  soft voice tugged at her consciousness. 

"Go away." Elsea mumbled distractedly, arching her back to let the ropes burrow into her skin. They left angry red marks in return. 

"Elsea." She whipped her head towards the noise in realisation.

Everett was peering out from a nearby tree, and Elsea startled before snapping her eyes to the guards. He pressed a finger to his lips, creeping silently towards her. He gently sawed at her restraints, eyes on his knife. 

"You'll be killed for this." Elsea hissed, urging him to leave. There was no time for pleasantries or explanations. 

Ever just shook his head and his concentration deepened. He mouthed the words "almost there" and began cutting with an intensity that made Elsea cringe away from the knife. His back was completely to the guards, letting Elsea keep a lookout. They wouldn't be distracted for long. With a final yank, Everett pushed Elsea out of the ropes, shoving her to her feet. They ran long strides, a fire of panic and confusion fueling her forward. A giddiness distracted her logic, and Elsea grabbed Ever's hand and ran. 

Elsea was a pebble dropped into a deep, dark well. But the sound of impact never came. She just kept falling. 

The sounds of discovery ripped through the haze.

"We're going to make it," Everett gritted his teeth and pulled Elsea forward in a movement that indicated controlled  panic. 

They ran and ran, their happy ending too vague and implausible to be an actual possibility. They didn't know what they were doing, but they were young and foolish and hoped too much to think about what they were doing and who they were. It was a moment that Elsea wanted to live in.

And then... it was over. Elsea's luxury of panic was gone. Everett fought tooth and nail, and Elsea winced as Fra was kicked in the gut. Ever didn't stop struggling until she calmly told him to stop. 

"Well, well, well. It seems Elsea has a friend," Fra grunted,  blowing out the last candle of hope.

"Fra, please. My sister doesn't know he even exists. You don't have to take him." Elsea pleaded, a desperation working herself into an internal frenzy. 

"Don't make me the villain, kid. I'm doing what I have to do." Fra gave her a sad yet resigned look. 

The reality of what position Everett was in dawned on the princess, and suddenly she was terrified. She whirled on him, anger an easier emotion to resort to.

"What were you thinking?" Frustration coloured Elsea's voice, emotions coursing through her hotly. "Why would you-you came back-God, Everett-" Elsea felt her eyes get wet as she tried to form coherent words that expressed everything she was thinking.

"I was your last chance," Everett swallowed, the guards swinging their gazes back and forth. "If I could go back in time, I wouldn't change a thing. I would let you spill coffee on me a million times over if it meant meeting you."

"You gave up everything. It's not supposed to be like that. What can I give up for you?" Her voice was desperate and brittle.

Nothing. There was nothing she could do in return. They were perfectly wrong for each other.

The guards pushed them along in a hesitancy that showed even they could feel the sparking tension between them.

Elsea ran over the list of what could happen to Ever. Maybe her sister would understand and let him go, but she doubted that was the case. Saphira would be intrigued and want to know more. Possibly he'd end up behind bars for something. A hideous image of Ever being executed flashed in Elsea's  mind. 

He  might never see his family again. All because of her. Her family. Her birthplace. The lack of control was crashing into her again, taking Ever with it.

The newly discovered control over her own life had only been temporary. 

It was then the Elsea felt it. A tingling, simmering thing soaking underneath her skin. Aching to be released. It was pent up emotion and anger and glass shards and straining chains. It was unspoken words and the desire to run barefoot in a grassy field, feeling the dewy dirt softly  powder the soles of her feet. It was the indescribable want to live. With absolute control. 

Everett must've seen something in her eyes because he whispered her name. He gave her the most heartbreaking smile she'd ever seen, and told her it was going to be okay. 

"No, its not." Elsea snapped.

Ever's green eyes met hers. "I know." His voice seemed to be choked out of him.  A silent understanding passed between them, the unspoken words hanging in the air. 

"I know."

___

Remember when I said that there wouldn't be as much angst? 

I was lying. 

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