THE SCAR THAT NEVER BLED

|END UP LIKE OUR PARENTS|

November 13th 1977

By early dawn i got woken up by the sound of birds chirping and the sound of a train horn in the distance.

"Morning" Robin says

I groaned out as I lifted my lower self off the hard wood, damn sleeping on his hard floor made me miss my bed. I rubbed my eyes.

I checked my watch and it reads 9:34am.

"What are doing up so early?"

"I've been up since almost 5am, sleeping on a old wooden bridge is not my ideal bed"

"Me either" Robin grabbed my hand and pulled me up from the bridge planks. As I got up on my feet again I was face to face with him. Our hands were still intertwined, against each other's chest.looking into those brown eyes i had a sudden, giddy roiling in the pit of the gut. It felt like being on a rollercoaster and having your stomach drop. Suddenly I remember the last time I had feelings like this for someone. I snap out of the trance, I flipped my hair back and back up from him and thanked him.

I began to walk away, towards back to town. Robin followed behind

Love and I were tricky,Yes I want to be in a loving relationship with somebody I've always dreamed about being with somebody romantically.But it felt like love wasn't a big fan of me. It almost felt like how I looked like in people's eyes was this wicked ugly witch that no one could ever love.People say falling in love is good but falls is such a sad word if you really think about it. Falls are never good. You fall behind, you fall down on the ground, you can even fall to your death.

I remember when I was 5 my mom told me something I will never forget

"When you make someone fall in love with the darkest parts of you, there's nothing you can do to scare them away"

I probably blame it on my quietness the most. If were to act in a movie I would always be the background character. People would phase me as a transparent color,the one that always blends into the crowd, the one that never gets noticed or taken time into. I constantly feel like that one box filled with Halloween decorations on the top shelf in the basement that only gets noticed once a year.

Growing up watching Cinderella, The Little mermaid and beauty and the beast memorized at the love they shared. How easy they clicked with each other. I see the same thing down the halls at school. Couples walking to class together, watching the glaze in their eyes looking at their partner.Then well the intimate ones which I wasn't a fan of. I feel this lonely empty feeling deep down in my heart, thinking 'why couldn't that be me' having somebody I love by my side, on my side for once loving me for how I am
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Suddenly Robin tapped me on the shoulder I turned around

"Look, Mar it's a gas station"

"Did that gas station just appear out of nowhere" I giggled

"I guess we passed it last night and didn't see it"

As we were walking up towards the gas station it was named firestone gas station.I padded my pocket and there was nothing, no money no nothing just the thin material that carries nothing

"Robin" I called to him as he turned around

"I have no money"

"Just grab stuff and walk out, be sneaky about it though" he seemed to completely ignore what he just said and continued to walk up to the store. I furrowed my eyebrows together, it seemed like he was trying to cover up the 'i love you' thing he said.

My parents always stole, hell my dad robbed a gas station when he was 17 and my mom she sold Marijuana on the corner around the block. I didn't wanna end up like my parents, I hated them for that. My mom would constantly ask me to stuff things in my jacket pocket when we didn't have enough for something. She claimed that we needed it for our survival. When at the end of the day it was literally a beer bottle. Because well nobody would expect a 11 year old kid to steal, right?

As we both walk into the run down gas station I'm met with the old folk music playing on the speakers. A smell suddenly came under my nose. I couldn't describe it as anything I've ever smelled before but my bets were on smelly cheese at least. I looked to my left where the cash was and the cashier was there. I muttered put a swear, I was hoping they would be gone.

In the gas station there were some people in here.which was surprising since it was in the middle of nowhere.There was an elderly man with a cane in his right hand reading the newspaper while leaning against the wall as you first walk in which was wearing a grey suit.There was a middle aged women, having brown short hair that curled upwards at the ends with some grey starting at her roots.wearing a dark teal long skirt that had flare at the bottom of it. A dark grey v neck top to go with it, dark violet heels that clicked every step she took. And also a black hand bag.

I made eye contact with the cashier, it was a young boy, I'm guessing early 20s. He had dark blonde hair that was lightly greased and that parted to the side. He had black rectangular shaped glasses. He was wearing the store uniform, a light blue button up with the name tag on the right and the store name on the left side. Wearing dark washed Jeans and I didn't get to see his shoes.

I quickly looked away and went down an random aisle. I thought where Robin was at.this gas station wasn't that big. I got to the drink refrigerator part of the store. I gulped down, my throat begged for a drink. But I knew if the cashier saw the freezer being open by me and I walk out with nothing that he sees at least would be suspicious. I then over heard conversations, it was the cashier cashing somebody out. I knew he was distracted. I looked to my left and saw Robin mention a motion with his hand that meant 'grab something!' as he stuffed a Snickers bar into the inside pocket of his jacket

I opened the freezer and got my favorite drink quickly. I stuffed it down my shirt. I nearly gasped at the coldness it felt on my chest. But I remained cool and immediately walked out.

As I walked out I waited for Robin but there was no sign of him. I got worried and started biting the inside of my cheek, I always did that when I got nervous. But he showed and met with me.

He was about to pull out what he got but then I stopped him quickly as I saw the cashier looking directly at us through the window. He definitely knew we stole hopefully he ain't a snitch.
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When we got far enough so we weren't close to the gas station anymore Robin pulled out what he got. He got a small bottle of lemonade, mini eggs and a Snickers bar which he gave me "you got all this?"

He nodded

"No way" I said to him

"Yeah" He says

"Wow"

I was surprised. This couldn't have been the first time he's ever stolen. I pull out the drink I had in my bra and took a drink of it.

I could see Robin judging me

"Don't judge me"

"I'm not , smart"