Kuch Kisse Roohaniyat Ke

Page 11 ...Continued...

Dear Diary

I had left the page incomplete yesterday and here I'm again to fulfil what was left incomplete

Love ! It's not the bollywood style stuff I thought of , it's more than that , the reality version of that filmy kind of love is painful , Much more painful than you could ever think of

Aarav was what My mother thought was right for me , Was he ? I don't even want to think about that because Sidharth.....
Sidharth was the only person in my mind and my heart at the time....

He was just a man on that train but now he is what I desire every moment, every second of my life....

He is My soulmate!
Now you may think me as crazy as you want for getting a Soulmate in just a few months but for you all to know the first time I met him I knew he was special, Much more special than anyone in my entire life

And after the fight we had, I felt I lost him but his words they kept me sane
' I won't leave you Shehnaaz, tu chahegi na tab bhi nhi , I love you sweetheart '

His voice was that Medicine to my broken soul that you couldn't even imagine , yes I cried, cried because I knew I Spoiled what ever special was there between us on the day that was supposed to be the best of our lives together but I never wanted to hide Aarav from him, Aarav was a chapter of my life , a chapter that took away my family from me , My mother is not gonna talk to me soon but I don't care, When she could think to prioritise Money over my happiness why couldn't I keep my love over them .

Because you can't! You still love her alot My heart replied and I knew that was true but I was supposedly angry even on my father that why couldn't he just Make me Marry Sidharth on the very first instant

After I ended the call with my father I heard Sidharth calling me ....

"Shehnaaz"

And believe me I felt as if my broken world was just fixed with ' tape and glue '
Tape and Glue it is !!!!

" Why did you hide it Shehnaaz" He spoke

He was drunk I could make out , never in these months I saw him sloshed and this was because of me

" I loved you , even before you can imagine Shehnaaz, that day..... The meeting on the train was fixed by that almighty above and I knew I knew I lost my heart the exact moment Shehnaaz" He spoke

" Sidharth" I murmured but he stepped backwards hitting the bed and laying flat on it on his back and chuckled sarcastically

" This is what you did with my heart .... You caressed it with your love, you leave me broken and now you crushed it " he uttered

I know none of this, he was gonna remember the next moment, when he is sober enough but these words were ripping me apart , I sat down beside him and took his face in my hands caressing his lower lip

" I really love you Shehnaaz" he spoke

His eyes were heavy with the amount of alcohol he had, but he still felt the most beautiful man out there in the world, with his hairs haphazardly messed up and his shirt soaked in alcohol he still was my Sidharth
Before I could make out his lips were on mine , cherishing them , nibbling them and taking out his anger on them , I know because I could feel the harshness in them but I didn't wanted to stop him , if this gives him the assurance that I do love him

" Say that you are just mine " He growled

" I Am yours Sidharth, forever" I muttered

" Then let me love You Shehnaaz, the way I am supposed to, the way that Aarav could never love you , the way Only I have a right to see you and no one else, the love that connects me to your soul forever Shehnaaz, May I" he spoke

I sat rooted there, I knew I was ready because before he walked out I Was wanting to take that step in our relationship, but like this !!!!

I am not sure ! He won't even remember it in the morning and what if he hates me .......

But before I could make a sane decision I felt his lips on my neck taking out all the sanity out of my mind making me give in the desires of my body....

Whatever happened after that is not for you my dear Diary because I felt the most beautiful person out there .

Yours ....
Ahanmn His Shehnaaz
His Ms. Beautiful

*

Do you remember any of this Sidharth?

I do , Ofcourse I do it's just I'm not able to connect with me being drunk part...
The first time we made love was the day she proposed me ....
The day she was broken the exact day she just mentioned...

But why don't I remember that fucking Aarav....

Aahhh my head.....

It will burst .....

Relax Sidharth you need to stay calm

And who the hell you think you are, you are not the person who visited me this morning and read the diary everyday, why were you reading it now ? Where is my Shehnaaz!!!! This is her diary evryone cannot read it , Only Shehnaaz can

How do you know suddenly she was Shehnaaz?

You might have never fallen in love, I have spent my 40 years with her
I might be late in guessing who she was but this uneasiness in me, this disturbing thoughts ....
I am sure she was Shehnaaz...
My Ms. Beautiful

What if she isn't?

She is ! She is my Shehnaaz! I don't even know what the hell happened that I landed  up here but all I know is I may have not seen her but she was My Ms. Beautiful

Shehnaaz Sweetheart Please ....
Why are you doing this to me .....
Shehnaaz.....

Love
Aaradhya
🤍

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And I really wanna know what is the confusing part in the chapters. Ask questions and I will try to answer them .