thanatophobia • jordan poole

one: new beginnings

RobynJo
I would say things have been difficult since my mother's passing. From the investigation, to the trail, to now living in a new part of California...it's a lot. My dad claimed that I just needed a new setting, but why am I still being haunted by it.

I jump out of my sleep with my hand clutching my chest to get my heart rate to go down.

"Another nightmare great", I say to myself.

Grabbing the towel from my nightstand I dab my forehead to get the night sweats that were produced from my bad dream. My back touches my headboard as I stare ahead at the cardboard boxes that were scattered around in my room. This just last week my father and I packed up all of our things and moved from Orange County to Napa. My father is a Family Medicine and thought Napa was the perfect place to start his own practice. He's only doing it so he can spend more time with me since you know.

I love my dad I really do, and understand that his long shifts at the hospital were only necessary to provide for his family. From the way he worked you would think my mom was asking for high end designer items.

My mom was the image of the perfect mom. She was very sweet, caring, and always wanted to see the best in people. Back in our old town there were rumors about her, but I always thought the other ladies were jealous and they were. I'm not going to dweel on the topic of my mother much longer. A knock is played on my door and my dad sticks his head in with a big smile on his face.

"Good morning future Dr. Avery."

Ever since I was little, my dad has been dressing me up in scrubs in hopes that I would follow his footsteps. It sounds nice, but being in school for that long doesn't seem appealing.

"Good morning dad."

He opens the curtains attached to the window pane to allow some sun to give the room life.

"How did you sleep?"

"I had another nightmare."

His face quickly saddens and walks over to my side of the bed sitting next to me.

"Things will get better in no time."

"Yeah I guess."

"But exciting news I got you enrolled in school so after the summertime you'll be straight."

"Yeah I think being around new people will make me forget about what happened. Once the trail started everyone kind of gave me fake sympathy you know. Awwww poor RJ saw her mothers bloodied body in her parents bed room."

"RJ!"

"Sorry dad you know I handle my trauma with humor."

"What did you therapist tell you about that?"

"She actually thinks I'm making progress so boom in your face."

He laughs shaking his head at my comment.

"Put your scrubs on you're helping me in the office today."

• • •

It was pretty slow today but I know my dad has a few appointments today. I'm pretty much his receptionist and help people get checked in and discuss their deductible rates. As of today I was doing whatever from watching tv shows in my iPad to messing with stuff that my dad had laying around in the office. The sound system we have installed for the door goes off and I see who I am assuming is her mom and her son. He immediately goes over to the waiting room to sit down. I give her a warm smile and get all the new patient stuff ready. Since my dad is opening up his own practice everyone here is a new patient.

"Hi welcome in! I just need you to fill these forms out and hand them back to me when you're done."

"Thank you."

I look over to see a freakishly tall and I say freakishly tall because his knees are almost touching his chest in the chair. He's on his phone not paying me or his mom any mind. Grabbing a lollypop from the glass bowl I rip the wrapper off and I guess it was a little too loud. The woman's son looks up at me and immediately I cross my legs.

He was kind of funny looking because of his head shape, but he's still cute. His lips curl up to give me a warm smile and I start smiling sticking my head into my iPad. One of the nurses come out and grab both the mother asked her son. I guess he was staring at me a little too hard because he bumped into the wall. I couldn't help but laugh shaking my head.

• • •

My dad walks out the mother and son out into the lobby as I was getting their paper work together.

"I would like to introduce you two to my daughter RobynJo. RJ this is Mrs. Poole and her son Jordan."

"It's nice to meet you guys", I smile.

I can see my dad raising his eyebrows because this is the first time I have smiled in months. Mrs. Poole and I shake hands and I go over to Jordan to shake his. He holds my hand a little longer and my dad clears his throat making us pull apart. The height difference between us is something that I'm already taking a liking to.

"She's going to be a senior at Valley Oak", my dad smiles.

"What a coincidence Jordan is going to be a senior at Valley Oak as well. Maybe he can show her around since she's new so she already have a friend in town."

"You know that sounds really good", my dad smiles.

He's been pushing me to get out there and make friends again. My mother's shouldn't put me back but I'm still grieving. While the adults are talking, Jordan leans over the counter to see what I'm watching on my iPad.

"You like Grey's Anatomy too?"

I was completely shocked because men use all their energy to hate on this show.

"Yeah it's my favorite."

"Maybe we can watch it together we're on the same season."

"Yeah that sounds nice."

We switch phones so we can exchange phones numbers and socials.

"I hope to hear from you soon RJ", he smiles.

"Or you can be the one to text me first."

"Yeah you're right he smiles. I hope you have a good rest of your day."

"You as well", I smile.

Mrs. Poole hands me the clipboard and we wave them goodbye as they walk.

"I see someone is making new friends", my dad smile.

I couldn't help but just smile while watching my tv show.