She's not afraid {n.h}

Chapter 63~ guilt

"I'm just so excited I can't contain it I mean I'll miss you and Maura and El and Louis and Harry and Liam and Danielle I think I'll just stop now but I'll still ring and text you all and come visit when your off im just Ahhh im actually going to do something with my life something I thought I'd never do I really do love you niall thank you for letting me go I know it was hard for you but you'll be away on tour and there's always Skype" I ramble on excitedly tying my hair up into a messy bun but am interrupted.

"Niall?" I question hearing sniffling coming from the bedroom as I enter slowly making my way over to the bed in my pjs.

I turn him over slowly and see his tear stained face I sigh quietly walking to the bathroom and getting a tissue switching the light off and making my way under the duvet next to him.

"It's going to be ok" I sigh trying to stop myself from crying kissing his forehead

"I'm sorry ive been trying to hold in these tears for so long I didn't want you to be upset when you left cause you deserve to be happy but it's just im gunna miss you so much I'm scared I'll lose you." he crys I shush him placing my hand on his cheek as he cries softly

"I remember tears streaming down your face
When I said, "I'll never let you go"
When all those shadows almost killed your light
I remember you said, "Don't leave me here alone"
But all that's dead and gone and passed tonight"I sing quietly to him

"Just close your eyes
The sun is going down
You'll be alright
No one can hurt you now
Come morning light
You and I'll be safe and sound" I sing to him caressing the side of his face gently as he closes his eyes I wipe his tears

"Don't you dare look out your window darling
Everything's on fire
The war outside our door keeps raging on
Hold onto this lullaby
Even when the music's gone
Gone" I look at his face he keeps opening his eyes every time I stop singing for a second to make sure I'm not going anywhere

"Just close your eyes
The sun is going down
You'll be alright
No one can hurt you now
Come morning light
You and I'll be safe and sound

Oooh, Oooh, Oooh, Oooh
La La
La La
Oooh, Oooh, Oooh, Oooh
La La "

"Just close your eyes
You'll be alright
Come morning light,
You and I'll be safe and sound...

Oooh, oooh, oooh, oooh oh oh oh" I finish kissing his lips softly and hugging him tight.

"I love you so much no one will ever replace you you own a piece of my heart a piece that one else can have and it's always going to stay that way" I sigh tearing up at his shaking body.

"I love you too" he whimpers as I kiss his forehead again to comfort him

"Well today's the day" I sigh turning over to face a sleeping Niall

I'm going to miss this so much knowing I'm not going to be able to hug him or have him near me really sucks.

I put out my hand and slowly caress his cheek and run my hand gently through his hair. I place a single kiss on his forehead and get out of bed

I squeal as two firm arms wrap round my waist and place me where I was before hugging me into there side

"Niall" I whisper as he smirks not opening his eyes

"Your going to make me late" I sigh putting my head against his chest hearing his slow heart beat against my ear

"That's the whole point" he smirks yet again pulling me in tighter

"Plus your mums coming"i state damn it Zoe as if he would get up for his mum

"She's probably bringing food and Theo" I add I get a shock he quickly sits up but I bounce back down again