𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐪𝐮𝐞 | machine gun kelly

38

A/N:

Surprise, surprise! I hope you guys like this chapter! Actually, I'm on winter break right now and I had some time to write so I decided to put this chapter out early. There will still be a Friday chapter, so don't worry. Enjoy!

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MY HEART SLAMMED AGAINST my ribcage continually, begging to be let out, knowing it couldn't survive outside of my body. Knowing I couldn't survive without it.

His words rang in my ear. Harsh, angry, and vulnerable in ways I couldn't count. It was anger that made him vulnerable. People assumed often that tears made people vulnerable, but assumptions were as different as those people were to each other.

"You shouldn't be here," The words were out from between my lips before I could stop them.

My voice cracked amidst those words. It made no sense to say them, but I didn't know what else to say in face of such blatant hatred. What you say to that? How do you explain yourself in face of detest?

He laughed then, his lips twisting apart to display his pearly whites as he threw his head back and laughed a forced laugh that turned into a genuine one of detestation and scorn.

He met my eyes again, his laugh slowly dissipating into thin air as he pursed his lips, his face morphing into his usual stone expression.

"Is that what you have to say to me?" He asked softly, and it startled me. His sudden soft tone. How could he do this? How could he go from fire to cotton and still burn me?

He neared me then, eyes intent on me.

"Is that all you have to say to me?" He repeated, his platinum hair falling into his eyes but not obscuring his vision.

"No," I shook my head, holding tears at bay.

That was not all I had to say to him. God, I had so much to say to him. But I knew I couldn't say half of those things, including letting him know that his son's birthday was just a few weeks away. Connor would be two, and it would be two whole years between Machine Gun Kelly and me.

"I-," I broke off as he looked at me, his eyes desperately peering into mine, his brows furrowed and fixed, slight perspiration glinting on his forehead. "I'm sorry."

He broke away as though I had shot him. He turned away and doubled over, gripping his head tightly with both hands as he straightened up. Then he turned to me and shook his head viciously.

"No, no," He uttered, words choked up in his throat. "Fuck this, Davina, fuck apologies."

"I'm so sorry," I repeated, swallowing a lump in my throat.

I didn't realize how guilty I felt for leaving until this moment. Before, I had thought he wouldn't care. But now it felt as though he did. Me leaving had affected him and I felt guilty for it.

"I-I didn't know you would care if I-," I started, but stopped short when he met my eyes, a vicious look swimming in them.

"You thought I wouldn't care?" Machine Gun Kelly spat, and if looks could even hurt, I would be bleeding out on the ground with shaking fingers typing the last 1 in 911 on my cell phone.

"You told me you loved me," He neared me, anger and hurt on his face. "You manipulated me into caring for you because I thought you cared for me."

The tears then fell from my eyes. I could hear myself telling him I loved him every time I had said those words. I could remember all the places I had told him, in that ice cream parlor in London, in my London hotel room..