fix me- Tommyinnit

8: Christmas.

Tommy

I was talking to tubbo and he was telling me that we have a two weeks vacation for Christmas. My face must have did something wrong because ranboo was now staring worriedly at me.

"you okay toms?"
"uh yeah. Just uhm.. Thinking" I usually didn't celebrate Christmas. Mom used to lock me up in my room and I would hear them laugh and chat about how great their presents are.

I always used to be jealous at kids for having a good family.. I wished every year to have a better Christmas or at least have a birthday party. Everyone forgot about me every time. I would just sit in my room wondering how would it be if anyone cared.

"tommy! Tommy are you listening?"
"yeah of course!"
"what was I saying then?"
"uh you were saying.. How we will have a vacation"
"Tommy that was before. I was asking you if we could have a sleepover"
"sorry not sorry"

"so?"
"what?"
"wanna have a sleepover?"
"when?"
"on Christmas"
"I don't know if my dad would allow me. I'm sorry big man"
"nah it's fine"

He really wouldn't. I will be yet again locked up in my room and at the end of his drinking phase he comes into my room and starts yelling at me.

He's such a prick isn't he. He really is-
"TOMMY"
"WHAT TUBBO. YOU SCARED ME"
"okay, what's up?"
"huh?"
"what is going on, huh? Why are you so zoned out?"
"I don't know. Guess I'm just tired?"

"well, it's time to go home."
"finally" how can they be so happy about going home? Well maybe they don't have such bad parents.

Maybe they're actually loved and maybe they even get attention.. Unlike me..

I packed my bag and got out.

_____________________________________________

"in your room, now."
"can't I just go outside? I swear I'll stay until Christmas is over"
"okay fine. You'll stay outside in the cold without a jacket. Go! Have fun. Stay a whole night alone and sad."

"but no. I need my jacket"
"you either go without it or not go at all"
"f-fine."

Stupid father
Stupid friends
Stupid me
Stupid fucking Christmas
Stupid shit
Stupid life
Stupid school.

Fucking idiot. I'm an idiot aren't I?

And here I was in the cold again. Of course it was snowing for fuck sake. I start walking along the city while my whole body was trembling.

Suddenly I feel someone run into me.
"I'm so sorry, I was in your way and-"
"tommy? What are you doing outside alone? Where's your jacket.?"

"I uh wanted to take a walk."
"don't lie to me."
"tubbo.. I just."
"is it complicated?"
"yeah.."
"wanna come at my house?"
"I just.. I don't want to bother you and your family.."

"Tommy I live alone."
"what, but how?"
"my family lives in another city and I had to come here for school. Will you come?"
"You sure I'm not bothering?"
"I'm a hundred percent sure."

"okay fine" tubbo and ranboo are always so nice to me.. It just makes me feel so special knowing that my friends are here for me.

They always take care of me.. Me and tubbo were walking along.
"thank you tubs"
"that's what friends are for, right?"
"I guess"
"what do you mean?"

"you and ranboo are my first friends. I never had any which is pretty weird because I'm fucking amazing."

"exactly you're fucking amazing and you deserve all the friends in the world." I didn't really have words. No one ever told me that. I never got any nice words.

"we're here Tommy! We got home" he said, smiling at me. It's pretty cool for a 15 year old to live alone.

We got inside. He had a nice and warm place. Very welcoming and big.

"should we decor the place together?"
"sure! It would be pretty difficult for me but it's okay"
"I'll help you with whatever you need"

"thanks tubbo"

_____________________________________________
MERRY CHRISTMAS GUYS!! HAVE FUN