Branded for sorrow (dark sbi)

Chapter 1

I looked up at my parents as if they were my entire world, not realizing that they were just a fantasy of mine. My mother was laying down on a bright blue picnic blanket, watching me and my father run around the flower field, full of energy and life. "Are you ready, son, to touch the clouds?" My father said to me as he picked me up and placed me on his shoulders. I've always adored the sky and everything about it. It brought me peace when everything seemed to be against me. It gave me comfort when something deep inside me was screaming that I didn't deserve to be happy. But I suppose I was just a child. A child born with tragedy in his blood. "Yes, dad, make me fly!" My father took a step back, scooped me up in his arms, and threw me up into the sky. I knew it wasn't that high, but it felt like it.

Fresh air filled my nose and spread throughout my entire body, giving me a sense of relief and freedom. My blond hair flew around, almost completely blocking my view of the sunset. The big world around me suddenly felt small, and I felt in control. I abruptly started to sway and giggled as I felt my stomach twist and turn. The earth appeared closer, the clouds appeared higher, and the trees appeared larger. My father was ready to catch me, looking up at me with his hands in the air, but he vanished along with my mother, the blanket, and all of our food. The trees started to take on shapes and sizes, and the earth started to turn a vivid red color. Yet I was still falling.

I keep falling endlessly, and as I do, voices and colors begin to fill my head. Though I can't hear the voices very well, the thought that they are there is almost comforting. It sucks because, for a minute I was happy, for a minute I was getting better, for a minute I had hope. But in a minute I lost it all again. How can a person be filled with life then be so empty ? Where does it all go?. Because I have always cared too much in a world that cares too little, my parents have always wanted to protect me. I always attempted to get through difficult situations without displaying any pain, regardless of how difficult they were. However, just because I don't express it doesn't mean I'm not feeling it. I know everything happens for a reason, but sometimes I wish I knew what the reason was. Maybe if I just knew why things happened, my life would be a little bit easier. I believe it would make a significant difference whether it was happy or sad. Even though life isn't fair, there must always be some darkness in order to see the stars. I'll continue to live, not so I can survive, but so I can feel and love.      

"TOMMY," my name was being yelled, but I had no idea where the noise was coming from. I can feel hands on me attempting to pull me out of this haze, but I am unable to move. I'm trapped in my mind, the mind that constantly reminds me of my past. I want to reply, ask for help, and be set free, but it's not that simple. In spite of my inability to see, I can feel my eyes attempting to open. My hand is now able to move around me, and the rest of my body is now aware of what is happening. Tears are streaming from my eyes, and my body is shaking as I see a blurry figure by my side, trying to soothe me by placing their hands on my face. "Shh, it's OK, I'm here, you're fine". I recognize that voice as belonging to my friend Tubbo. He has never left my side since I was brought to this orphanage, despite the fact that I am probably one of the most disliked people here. As much as he trusts me with his life, I do the same for him. There are friends, there are family and then there are friends that become family. Even though we are not related by blood he will always be my brother.