Buckingham Nicks A/U Series Part 2: Dreams

What You Lost (Part 2)

Aspen, Colorado
Sunday, December 18, 1977
(5:00 pm)
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"Do you remember the Toyota stalling in the snow in the Burger King parking lot?"

Lindsey was laughing right along with Stevie in the backseat of the car on their way from the airport to their destination, a rented three-story house in Aspen with five bedrooms and a fireplace on every floor. They had already passed several landmarks from their ill-fated journey to Aspen in 1974, and Stevie's memory, like her giggles, had become contagious.

"I remember splitting the fries with you that turned cold instantly and getting mad at you for ordering the large," Stevie said.

"Can you believe we did this, Stevie?" He turned to face her, her hand in his.

"What, baby? Get rich or get married?" They had been married for one day and it was still sinking in.

Lindsey chuckled and kissed her before he answered. If being married to Stevie means I get to laugh this much, I hope I live to be a hundred so we can I can laugh with her for seventy years. He said, "Actually both, but I was talking about being rich in Aspen."

"I know, right?!" Stevie's nose crinkled as she doubled over laughing. He loved watching Stevie laugh. She laughed with her whole body when she laughed, and he thought he would burst wide open with love for her. "The last time we were here we had like fifty bucks between us! Look at us now, baby!"

"The last time we were here..." Lindsey got serious then. He took both of her hands in his and watched her laughter die down. "...I behaved like a total asshole, Stevie. I just want you to know right now, before we start this whole honeymoon-holiday-marriage-new-year thing here...I am so, so sorry I hurt you, angel. I am not that guy anymore and I will always be ashamed that I was him for awhile. I love you. I love you, I love our little baby..." He brought a hand to her belly, which she covered with her own hand. "...I love that we finally got to watch all of our dreams come true, and I love that I get to live out all of those dreams with you...Mrs. Buckingham."

"Baby..." She brought her hand to her face and stroked his cheek with her thumb. "I know who you are, and I know who I was...and it's okay, sweetheart. Please don't be ashamed...I love you so much...I know you, Lindsey. I knew you before we could afford to rent a house in Aspen and I know you now...and I never stopped loving you, baby. Not once."

Lindsey leaned in to kiss her, and they spent the rest of the ride to the house kissing and nuzzling and talking to the baby to try to get it to kick the way it had on the plane.

The baby had also been kicking the morning of their wedding, all the way into the afternoon when Stevie was getting into her dress as Barbara, Robin and Christine took turns crying and hugging her. Her dress was as simple as the ceremony had been, a long white silk halter dress with she wore without shoes as she walked towards Lindsey and his best man - his brother Greg - on the sand. She was escorted by Jess who was beaming with pride as "Stephanie" played and the thirty closest people to them watched in awe and tears.

Mick was among the people in attendance that afternoon in Maui, after a long conversation between him and Lindsey apologizing for his actions. He'd cried for an hour as he explained his impending divorce, how Amy and Lucy were refusing to see him because they were older now and understood more, how he'd tried so hard to reconcile with the fact that Stevie would never be more than his good friend, a kindred spirit in a platonic way, and how he'd been using alcohol and cocaine to numb himself into oblivion.

"It's not easy to sit back and watch everyone else get their storybook ending when your life is falling apart," he told Lindsey that night on the deck of the bungalow overlooking the ocean where Stevie and Lindsey had been staying. "But that's no excuse for what I did, Lindsey. I know that."