WABI SABI (Epistolary)

#WabiSabiMM - 105

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Leonard Kal-il Saberon
hi bb mika pwede ka po bang makausap notice

From: Mika Amaris Ylanan

Hey,

I am honestly unsure why I am replying now but then after a few hours of contemplating, I guess I have to express these questions and thoughts so they can leave my mind. My mind maybe going haywire these days due to stress sa work tapos you–you and your twin–happened pa.

I know na sinabi ko nang I can move on and I don't need an explanation but I guess I am wrong. I don't know. I am confused. Siguro gusto ko lang sabihin ang mga bagay na ito for my own sake kasi I keep on thinking. After sending this, maybe, we can be good na. We'll see.

Why did you do it? Am I kind of a joke to you? We maybe strangers but wala naman yatang taong deserve lokihin or paglaruan, hindi ba?

Ako lang ba ang ginanito mo or trick mo na ito dati pa? You and your twin swapping?

Why did you lie? Why did you pretend to be your twin? Is your twin really unaware? You both sent me emails to apologize but I still don't get it. Ito ba ang nagagawa ng "love at first sight" kamo?

Do you really like me?

Hindi naman ako manhid para hindi mapansin ang mga banat mo at segue sa text and chat. Madali kong napapansin kapag interesado sa akin ang isang lalaki. And you're too vocal, too energetic not to be noticed.

If you don't, let us continue talking like normal but please stop acting as if you like me. We can be friends naman kahit hindi mo ako totoong crush. Papansinin pa rin naman kita. I just want the honesty. Strike 1 ka na kasi, e. I will not tolerate any more lies. Hahaha

On the other hand, if you really do like me, can I ask you a favor? I will not tell you to stop liking me but I want you to accept the fact that I cannot reciprocate your feelings–kung ano man itong feelings na ito. I can only give friendship. That's how I see you.

You are a very happy person and I like that about you. But we can only be friends.

I don't want to give you false hopes. I don't want you to assume. I have never been in a relationship. I don't know why but I am sure this is all I can give.

Ang haba na yata nito haha!

Anyway, thank you for reading until here. Expressing all these makes me feel better. Let us start anew. :)

From: Mika Amaris Ylanan

I'd also be honest. I don't actually befriend guys who like me more than a friend but I am making an exception for you. I am comfortable with you and I really see you as my Ate N and Reiko in one. I hope I didn't offend you. I just want to be very very clear because I appreciate you and I like your sense of humor.

I want us to be friends. Can we? :)

From: Mika Amaris Ylanan

Isang linggo na ang lumipas. I am observing myself kasi may pagkamarupok din ako minsan. HAHA But nothing has changed. Same pa rin. Let us be friends. Ikaw ang first ever kong guy bff kung sakali. Sorry for being straightforward. Friends?