HOW TO GET THE GIRL

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It had been six weeks since my mother's funeral and though the wound was still deep, it began to heal

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It had been six weeks since my mother's funeral and though the wound was still deep, it began to heal. Honestly, all the drama and antics of Greendale have successfully taken my mind off the situation...most of the time.

"What if they tried to remake it with a modern soundtrack? Can you imagine if they put Taylor Swift in there? It would be tragic-" Abed rambled to me about why it would be a bad idea for someone to remake Ferris Bueller's Day Off as we walked into school. To cut him off was Annie and Dean Pelton passing out flyers for tonight's STD Awareness Fair. Trying to prevent the spread of STDs on campus with a party and alcohol seems like an inappropriate choice. But why say anything?

Annie shoved flyers into me and Abed's hands, "Make sure to attend the STD fair tonight!"

I flipped through the pamphlet, "I don't know. Is Jeff coming?"

I caught Abed looking at me out of the corner of his eye.

Annie's plastered-on smile strained, "He's promised to make an appearance."

"Cool. We'll be there," I grabbed Abed by the arm and we walked away.

"Why do you care if Jeff is there?" Abed asked.

"Well, it's not really worth it if he's not there."

"Yeah...he's a really cool guy."

"Yeah," I piped up.

"He's probably getting a date."

"I wouldn't expect anything less."

He played with his thumbs, "So...are you going to get a date?"

The fact that he's so obvious and I haven't done anything about it is literally mind blowing.

I shook my head, "I just thought that I would hang out with you and Troy."

"What if Troy gets a date?"

"I don't think he would on this short of a notice, but if he did then it would just be you and me."

That's when Tory ambushed us from the back.

"Are you guys going to Annie's STD Fair?"

"Do you really think that Annie would let us ditch it? Of course we're going."

"What kind of school even throws an STD fair?"

"Are you just now realizing that Greendale is completely insane?" Abed jokes.

"What am I even going to do at an STD fair? Does the Dean realize that he is throwing a party where everyone is going to hook up? He's supplying free alcohol and condoms! It's completely going over their heads."

"Before you know it there's going to be an orgy in the cafeteria."

Troy slapped his arm, "Gross, Abed. We eat there!"

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