MAROON ; MILEVEN AU

4.

"oh no, my flower, i can't see you," el giggled at how daisy was hugging her legs, her head hidden right below el's stomach.

daisy tipped her head back. "mommy, i'm right here."

el laughed, gently holding her face. "of course, my heart! are you tired yet? it's your nap time, little one,"

daisy put on a thinking face before nodding. "tired, mama,"

"okay, then let's go to sleep," el held her hand and took her to her room. "in to bed you go," el held her up and placed her into the bed with a smile. "mommy will wake you in two hours," she pressed a kiss to her lips as daisy giggled and hugged her toys and blankets.

"okay, mama!" daisy leaned forward to kiss el's nose before snuggling back. "i love you,"

"aw, i love you so much more, my little flower." el gently rubbed her forehead. "night night now,"

"night night!" daisy exclaimed before leaning to her side to fall into deep slumber.

once el made sure daisy was safe and sound, she stood up carefully with a hand on her stomach and went to find xander who was happily preparing for school in a few days.

"hi," el smiled and xander looked up, a smile instantly forming. "hi mommy,"

el sat down on the couch before opening her arms for him to hug her. "how are you feeling, my love? you tired, bug? stressed?"

he shook his head. "no, not at all." he then tipped his head up. "mommy... are you scared?"

she tilted her head. "for what, my love?"

"baby vada. mommy... we're alone now... i mean, we used to be but... but... but now we're actually alone," he whispered and she bit down on her lip. "mommy isn't scared. i'm so excited for vada," she lied in a whisper.

she was indeed excited for her third child... but she wasn't about being alone. like xander said, they were always alone and they always did everything themselves.

but they had a safety net.

now they didn't... and they were truly alone.

no money, no nothing.

xander nodded slowly and el gave him a reassuring smile. "since your sister is sleeping, let's do something fun. i know i sometimes give my attention to daisy more—"

"but daisy is younger. she needs more attention or else she would be in trouble," xander said which made el let out a giggle. "that's true... but with baby vada coming, i just.... i just— don't want you to think i don't love or care or notice you. i want you to know you're forever my first born. my first love, okay? i'm always here for you and i know you're more independent than daisy but i want you to know i'm here, my love. i'm always here for you and i'll always love you." she ran a hand through his hair. "do you understand, baby? i love you so freaking much i could just squeeze you all day,"

xander looked away to stop the tears from spilling before he quickly threw his arms around her. "i know, mommy. you love me the most,"

el hugged him close, rubbing his back. "now what do you want to do, baby? anything you want,"

he shrugged. "let's just... play a board game. or watch a movie, i don't really mind. but i don't want daisy to miss out... can we just bake food?"

el's smile faltered because she wasn't sure if they had the ingredients. "sure, baby, yeah, yeah. i'll see what we can make," she whispered, gently running her fingers through his brown strands which made him smile widely.

she stood up front the couch and slowly made her way to the kitchen before finding a pancake kit. "um... my love, we only have a pancake set."

"it's okay!" xander stood. "i love pancakes and daisy does too!"