A new life (the sequal)

Chapter 2

"Dear, journal

Is it hard knowing that the guy that raped me is your best friend's husband?

Is it terrible that the one person that I want to talk to slept with your ex-boyfriend and lied to her husband about her kids?

I went to the park today, wondering what my life would be like right now if I wasn't been brutally attacked. Being raped isn't something I wanted to happen to me. I wanted to stay in Boston away from Perry. I wanted a kid, to bring into this world, but I didn't think that this would be the way.

I have never done drugs before. I wasn't planning on it either. I heard they are addictive.

Having, to be one of those people who almost committed suicide because they got raped by someone they knew...is insane. I thought writing in this journal would help me write out all my feelings and all the emotional damage I am going through. But it's everywhere I turn I see his face, staring back at me saying I'm going to be in your life Jane I am the father of your child, Jane."

"Jane I'm wondering why you are referring to yourself in the third person?"...asked the Doctor

"That's all your wondering about? You are not wondering why I almost committed suicide? I am speaking in the third person because I am speaking as if I am him."...said Jane

"Then why isn't he here to speak for himself?"...asked the Doctor

"Because I don't want him in my life."...said Jane

"I see you getting frustated we can talk about something else. Tell me how you handled Perry in the beginning?"...asked the Doctor

"Handled? Doctor, apparently I didn't handle myself very well because look at me: I'm going to therapy, I just got out of court and I'm raising a kid all by myself."...cried Jane

"I didn't realize how much pressure is on you Jane. If you were having problems with Perry before the incident occurred why didn't you see a therapist?"...asked the Doctor

"I didn't want to dump all of my baggage onto the therapist and have her think I'm damaged. It's bad enough that people had to hear me yell at Perry through my phone to tell...him to go away. Having to hash out every single thing that Perry had done to me is going to be hard."...said Jane

"Then tell me about what happened little by little we have all the time in the world, Jane."...said the Doctor

"I had a boyfriend at the time. We've been together for several months it would have been a year--"

"Did you tell him you wanted to wait?"...asked the Doctor

"Actually no, this time I didn't mention it. This time I bought sexy clothes. We were going to celebrate our anniversary so I decided to cook dinner at home with a nice candle-lit dinner and that night was going to be that night...the night I decided I want to lose my virginity. But other things took over"

"What do you mean 'other things took over?'"...said the doctor

"I mean instead of putting on sexy clothes, he broke up with me instead. I got so angry that I threw everything at him plates, food, and wine. And he told me' I'm sorry Jane, to know that you the one I need to date other people to see if I want to be with you.' So he broke up with me because he wanted to see if he wants to be with me or be with other people. So after I left I started cleaning and crying."...said Jane

"Going through breakups are hard, especially when you are ready to take the next step. Usually, men are not ready for the next step. There is a percentage of men who ask their girlfriends to move in but when you accept they get scared and they start to notice the realization that there taking the next step."...said the Doctor

"And then I went upstairs to get ready for bed. And the next thing: I heard is a noise so I sleep with a bat next to my bed I grabbed it and walked across the room. And the window was open, so I closed it and then I went back to bed and an hour later I heard someone in the room across from me like footsteps. So I grabbed my bat and headed towards the room. I noticed he had on a mask so I ripped it off and it was Perry. Perry Weiss and Connor were the ones inside my house."...said Jane

"What did you do when you found out that one out of the three kidnappers was your best friend?"...asked the Doctor

"I was embarrassed. Connor was one of those people who would understand what your going through. When my parents died all I wanted was Connor, because he went through the same thing I went through."...said Jane

"Well, why wasn't he there?"...asked the Doctor

"According to my ex best friend Celeste. He came to school telling Celeste that he has or had feelings for me and that he wanted to tell me. Celeste told him no. She didn't give him the reasoning."...said Jane

"You wanted Connor there so that he can take your mind off of the fact that your parents died. So he waited for years, and he had an opportunity to tell you but he decided to have sex with you instead."...said the Doctor