Feel Everything.

Feel Everything. pt 1.

*Story*

The setting is the same as it's been every single day.
Dark and glumly.
I can't imagine feeling anything different at this point.
I remember everything.
Everyone..... it's scary.
I'm here in the middle of the street I just got hit by a car I'm deeply confused and deeply hurt.
How I got here is what you may be wondering, well....it all started a week ago.
It was 5am and I was in bed thinking about things I could do to make my teenage life feel what people call more 'exciting.'
I look for answers on the internet and all the answers google gave me included money and I definitely don't have that I'm a simple girl that acts expensive.
My mother works for some dead end job in the ministry and I live with my grandma.
They're always telling me "Jordan! Why are you always on your phone so early in the morning!??"
Well why are you not minding your own business SO EARLY IN THE MORNING?!
They're so many things I wish I could change... like me I wish I could change everything about myself but it's like I'm indestructible to change.
Or maybe I'm just scared who knows?
I got up from my bed and decided the least I could do with my life is get ready for school.
I'm not a private school late attendant I am actually a public school late attendant which is completely different.
I showered as fast as I could and I was in my uniform. I said bye to my mother and told her I love her. I tell her that everyday cause it's true.

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I always walk to the bus stop it's far from my house so it takes about half an hour to get there. I try my best not to think too hard when walking to the bus stop cause my head hurts each time but something different bloomed while I walked to school today.
I contemplated.
I kept looking at the ground I usually look at the clouds.
But I thought....
Everyone thinks they're up seated on a cloud some people think they're in space...others believe that they're laying upon a thunder cloud.
I too believe that I'm floating in space with the Milky way.
But I'm not.
I'm here.
On earth.
And my feet are on the ground.
I'm not floating...I'm walking.
The sun continuously burns my skin and it annoys me much.
My shoes are muddy I've been stepping on soil not stars.
I look down and I think of all the types of people that have walked on the exact same soil that my shoes have stepped on too.
I continue to look below me and I realize everything that's mine is here....on the ground, the food I eat comes from this soil the people I love and care about step on this soil.
This soil is older than me.
Probably had better days than me.
People in love have stepped here.
People filled with loath have stepped here.
Tired, confused, happy, people filled with pain, fear and anger have stepped on the exact same soil.
The setting is the same as it's always been I tower my head up to sky to see that it's blue...and I feel kinda blue too.
I look ahead of the street to see a dead body and I'm no mystery solver but what the hell is going on??!!!!
I thought maybe it's just a crazy person who decided to sleep in the middle of the road but as I got closer i was clearly mistaken cause that wasn't a crazy person that was a dead body and the only crazy person who was on that street was me cause boyyyy! I panicked!
I looked at the man and I felt a kind of connection to him for some weird reason I didn't know what to do!!!
What was I going to do? There was no one on the street!
My breathing became so heavy I could feel my nostrils get bigger!
was I supposed to leave and act like I saw nothing (which would haunt my conscience forever).
Or find help and find out who would leave him here?
I obviously made the right decision....

I left.

It was literally a Monday! I couldn't deal with a dead body at 6 in the morning!!
I left and I was terrified.
I kept thinking of going back but I was better off NOT GETTING INVOLVED!!!!
I quickly walked to the bus stop, waited for a bus and in no time I was at school I kept on thinking about the body.
My body felt numb every single time I thought about it.
But it's probably for the best if you simply forget about it Jordan!
I mean it's not my fault that the person was there and i shouldn't feel bad it's none of my business.
But why did I feel so connected to a dead body? A freaking dead body?!!?
Jordan you're definitely losing it!
Actually I think I've lost it!
Before I could even continue thinking I noticed someone in a brown suit.
I thought it was a teacher but no.
No teacher at this school can afford Prada.
My friend Penelope came___ "are you okay?"
"Yeah I'm fine. What's wrong?"
"You look like you're on the edge"
"No, no, no I'm fine! Me edge? Nah I can't even do no edges lol"
"Hahaha, real funny Jordan now let's get to class"
I look back at the block where the man in the suit was and he was no longer there I tried my best to look around but Penelope grabbed my hand and dragged me to class before I could even look any further.

The first period was Religious education.
It's honestly not my best subject but I'm not that bad at it either.
Time went by so fast cause I spent the whole period thinking and I couldn't take it anymore!
I asked the teacher if I could be excused.
___________________________________

I went to the bathroom to wash my face and think cause nothing made sense I spent about 5 minutes telling myself I'm fine, it's none of  my business, I FELT NOTHING!
I walked out of the bathroom and the man in the brown suit came out of nowhere I immediately screamed
"Ahhhh! Who are you? I feel like you're following me!! Leave me alone!!"
Man: "Unless you want to end up like the dead guy you saw on the street you better get quiet"
"Wha....ah...what? How do you? But there was no one on the street when i saw him.
Who are you? How do you know? What do you want?"
"My name's Max, I'm a man who knows everything and everyone you can call me God if you want"
I couldn't see this man's face and I was so afraid and he started joking around?

"This is no time to joke around Mr!"
"I said Max not Mr young lady... I'm guessing you have trouble hearing. Let me take you to a place where you'll hear everything clearly. *Silence*
Bag her!"
"Bag me? Wha---ahhhhh!!!!"
Next thing I know they were two strong men besides me and my head was in a bag I have no idea what's happening!!!!!!

To be continued.....