Michael.

seven

I said it. I finally admitted how I felt, and I couldn't be happier she felt the same way, although she's still nervous. I love her. God, I've never loved anyone like I love her. I'm not the type of person to commit so easily, yet with Jackie, she makes it seem easy to commit to. I want to commit my time and life to her and the twins. Little Ellen and Elliot deserve the world, and Jackie deserves the universe. After everything she has been through, she deserves a break. I wish I could be everything she deserves, but I can't. Although, that won't stop me from trying. It had been a week since I told her everything, and now, being twenty weeks pregnant, she is closing in on birth. I want to help her with anything and everything. The drive is no problem when it comes to seeing Jackie.
Today, she is babysitting Haven for Jenny and invited me over to hang out. She couldn't pick her up because of her bump and needed a bit of help while her parent's were out to see family with James. I happily obliged. I pulled into the driveway, parking my car and going to the front door. I rang the door and seconds later I saw Haven's face squished against the glass door followed by Jackie's laughter.
"Havey," Jackie said, moving her back and opening the door, "hey Michael." "
"Hey," I said, hugging her, and then squatting down to Haven's level, "and hello to you, pretty thing." I picked her up, smiling.
"Who are you talking to?" She asked and we laughed.
"Both of you," I said with a grin, following her into the den. There were baby toys scattered while a toddler's TV show flashed on the television. "It looks like a nursery in here," I said.
"It mind as well be," she said, picking up a few things, "This is a mix of Haven's toys and the twins' future toys."
"Hey, don't worry about that. I'll get it," I said, "sit down and watch this lovely show." She laughed.
"My favorite episode, too," she joked, and I grinned. "Haven should be going down for a nap soon, I can get a lunch going then."
"Sounds good to me," I said, sitting on the floor while Haven handed me toy food. "Are you making a lunch, Havey?" I asked, and while she couldn't talk, she happily continued.
"So what have you been doing?" She asked, watching the two of us.
"Work, work, work," I said, "did I mention work?" We laughed. "I've had to work overtime at the shop a lot lately."
"Saving up for something?" She asked with a smile.
"Yeah, I have a few things in mind," I said honestly. I wanted to save up to get the twin's a few things. I knew Jackie wanted to go with the bare minimum, but the three of them deserved more than that. I was determined to get it for them.
About thirty minutes later, Haven had calmed down and the three of us sat on the couch. Haven was laid out across my chest, a bottle in her mouth, watching the Telly. She was tired from playing and it was her naptime anyway.
"I can take her into her crib," Jackie said.
"No, it's fine," I said honestly. I didn't mind.
"You two look cute together," she said, and I chuckled. After a few minutes, I decided to ask about a previous conversation.
"So what do you think?" I asked.
"About what?" She replied.
"About us?" I answered. She paused.
"I would like to," she said, "I would love to, but my priorities are the twins at the moment."
"Mine would be too," I said, "I would do anything for them or for you." She thought for what felt like forever.
"Michael, I hope you're serious," she said.
"I would never joke about something like this," I said, "Jackie, I see us growing old together. You're exactly what I need regardless of your past."
"I love you, Michael," she said suddenly.
"I love you too, Jackie," I said, and I meant it. Every last word I said to her, I meant. I knew from very early on I liked her, and now, it was easy to say I loved her. "Now come on over here," I said, opening my arm out for her. She grinned, leaning into me. I smiled, rubbing her arm. It was perfect in that moment. I was finally able to tell Jackie how I felt without worrying how she would react. I could confess my love without worrying she would be upset. It was perfect.
"I'm sorry I'm moving so far," she said, glancing up to me.
"Don't be sorry," I said, "it only makes our meetings more valuable."
"I know," she said, "but if I had moved closer we could spend more time together before the twins."
"The twins won't slow us down," I said, "we will just have to modify how we visit."
"Yeah, I guess," she said, sighing loudly, "it's just such a burden but such a miracle at the same time." I smiled.
"How so?" I asked.
"The doctor appointments, I can barely afford one baby, yet alone two," she said, "yet I'm still so happy. They are the only good thing to come from him."
"What are you going to do once they get older and want to know who their father is?" I asked.
"I'll just have to tell them. I don't want to make him out to seem terrible, because i loved him at a time, he just made a mistake," she said slowly.
"Yeah," I said, "and you don't want them to be scared of him."
"True, they can make out their own thoughts of him, yet while I have a say, they will stay as far away," she said, and I agreed. Ellen and Elliot deserves to know who their father was, even if he wasn't the best man. I wanted to be a father to them. I wanted to make them have a father-figure when their dad couldn't treat the three the way they deserved. It killed me inside to the thought that two little babies were conceived from such an evil man. I believe things will work out for the best, yet sometimes, the best is hard to see when people like Kyle exist.