She had asked to be moved to a different part of the house, wanting some new scenery.
But that wasn't the only reason she asked to be moved. She wanted to be alone and be able to do what she needed before she would give birth.
She wanted to write a letter to her family and her friends. To her wife and husband. To her baby.
She held so much faith that she would make it out of this. That she would wake up reborn and be happy and healthy but she had her doubts.
She knew that this was risky and that there was a high chance she wouldn't make it out to see another day. That she would leave her husband and wife to take care of their child alone without her.
That her sweet, innocent baby wouldn't get a chance to know her and that she would just be a story that her husband and wife would tell at night.
About how strong and brave she was but Mariana was scared. She was absolutely terrified of what would come and she knew she couldn't leave this earth without leaving some kind words behind.
She knew her family would need it.
She knew Bella would need it.
And she knew without a doubt in her mind that Edward would need it the most.
She hoped that they could survive without her. That he could survive without her.
That he would be the father she knew her baby would need. Mariana hoped that Bella could save Edward from doing anything stupid once she was gone.
But instead of saying what she knew she needed to say, she wrote it.
She knew it was probably a cowardly thing to do. To write to her loved ones instead of just saying it to them but she knew she wouldn't be able to say the right thing. Mariana knew that her emotions would get the best of her.
So, instead she wrote. She wrote everything she knew she needed to say. She wrote everything she felt.
She needed them to know exactly how she felt with no interruptions. They wouldn't be ready to face a world without Mariana and she knew they weren't ready to hear it either.
She knew it and she too feared not being in a world with them but she couldn't be scared right now.
