Obama just arrived back at the white house.
"Honey, I'm home!" He shouted.
Michelle Obama was was in the kitchen. Obama was home just in time, she was finishing up dinner. "You're home just in time, I'm finishing up dinner!" She said.
"Wonderful! Uhh, what's for dinner tonight?"
"The same as every night! Barracoli!"
"Michelle you make Barracoli every night. Would it kill you to make something else. Something with, uhh, I don't know, meat?"
"MEAT!" She was furious, "Why would you even suggest eating something as unhealthy as meat? America's children are all morbidly obese so you have to set a good example by eating nothing but healthy vegetables! Meat makes children fat! Why don't you ever think of the children?"
"Well, uhh, meat is also important for health. It's full of, uhh, calcium, which builds strong bones." Mr. Skeltal, Obama's Secretary of Health and Human Services, informed him of this.
"I don't care what your Cabinet says, this Barracoli will make sure the children are not obese! You're going to eat it!"
Well, uhh, I guess there's no use then. This is a fight I, uhh, just can't win. Like Vietnam, but instead of Americans it's me, and instead of Vietnam it's you. This analogy made more sense in my head."
The Commander in Chief ate the Barracoli. With his first bite he felt a surge of power. 10% of his body fat instantly became muscle. That's the power of healthy eating.
"Well, uhh, that was some fine eating." Obama stood up and looked at his watch. "Would you look at the time. If you, uhh, excuse me, I need to watch Game of Thrones"
"Already? We didn't even talk about your day."
"What's there to, uhh, talk about? Zimmerman is taking over companies and I summoned the ghost of Ronald Reagan to convince the Repubes to buy me tanks. You know, uhh, normal President stuff." Obama began to leave the kitchen, "Ill see you in a few hours."
"Obama headed down to his man cave. It was a large room that included Obama's reclining massage chair, a huge flat screen tv, a bar, pool table, and a fridge filled with beer. Obama plopped into his recliner and turned on Netflix. He found the episode he was currently on.
"This is, uhh, my jam," he said as he popped open a beer.
About halfway through the episode his Obama-phone rang. "Mr. President, I have something I need to tell you."
...
Michelle heard a loud scream from the basement. She ran down as quickly as she could. Obama was curled up on the floor, his Obama-phone was broken, and lying beside him.
"That bastard"
"What wrong Barracks? Who was it?"
"It w-was, GEORGE ZIMMERMAN!"
"Oh no! What did he do?"
"T-the bastard did the worst thing imaginable. The most unforgivable thing he's ever done."
"What's he done?"
"H-he spoiled season 3 of Game of Thrones"
Michelle looked annoyed, but Obama was grief stricken. He's been flim flamed too many times. He could not let these acts go unspoken. Obama let loose a mighty roar.
"ZIMMERMAN!"
