That Time a Huge Schnozz Sniffed me into a Different World.

Ep.10 Peak of the World

"...gged!!" Nagzz yelled finishing his sentence. He held both his hands over his butt while he looked around panic stricken and deeply afraid of any long slender objects.

A chilling wind pushed against him, jumping, he spun around staring out over the world from its peak. In the blued distance he could see the beginnings of desert, numerous settlements and sparse patchy forest. The wondrous view stole his breath and panic, giving him a sense of scale he hadn't experienced before. We really are tiny. He thought.

The peak was astoundingly flat, apart from one cone of rock sat in its centre. Seeing this bizarre formation he decided to explore his surroundings, approaching it as he looked out over the fading forest in the distance. As he got closer to the rock he could hear faint grumbling from the otherside.

"Err hello?.. Is someone there?" He asked, warily.

"Huh? Ohh Nagzz hi." A brown haired woman, with horns sticking out of the side of her head, jumped out from behind the rock. "How did you get up here?"

"Honestly I have no idea, Fraiki. It turned four o'clock and Cinnamon disappeared in front of me. Then I was enveloped by the same light so I was sure I was going to get pegged."

"Huh? That makes no sense, and what does the time have to do with anything?"

"It's a long story." Nagzz sighed. "Anyway I saw you with Tambo, how did you get here?"

"Ahhh." Fraiki sighed. "Well after you disappeared, Tambo and the brain cell protection league were in a standoff for a while. They just sort of stood there and stared at each other, until they both admitted defeat at the same time. Then they argued about it for some reason, it was seriously idiotic."

"Well that's Tambo for you."

"Tell me about it." Fraiki sighed again, before continuing her story. "After about three hours of the same rotating argument they started laughing with each other and Tambo agreed to never go out of their way to hunt down the Thinkers and focused on making a zoomer HQ in the forest. I had enough of their shit so I fled here but I have no idea how I am going to achieve my goal now." She lamented.

"Let me guess your goal is like stupidly easy, like admit to loving feet or something cool like start a kingdom." Nagzz whined, unaware at how easy getting cows milk would have been if he'd opened his eyes.

"If only. I could do those things easily." Fraiki complained. "No, I have to make a coffee business and sell a single cup. How unfair is that!? I know I pretend to hate coffee but this goes against everything I stand for. Even if the prize for achieving this goal was feet pics I couldn't achieve it in a million years!"

"Really it's only one cup of coffee. It can't be that hard surely."

"It is hard and don't call me Shurly!"

"Ok, ok.. Wait."

"I had found coffee beans in the fading forest too but as Tambo is there I don't want to go back!" She added, still complaining.

...

"Look, if you make that cup of coffee I'll buy it from you ok? You might have to go back to Tambo, and my condolences on that, but It might well be your only choice. This author's voice, thingy, is just that stubborn and inconsiderate."

Heyy that's un...ok actually I guess I kind of deserve that...

"Yeah you're right." Fraiki sighed in defeat. "I'll come find you once I have that cup ready. Thanks Nagzz."

"No problem."

With that Fraiki sighed one last time and flew off towards the fading forest. Nagzz looked around the peak one last time, still unsure about what to do. Spotting a convenient path cut into the mountain he started following it down. As he travelled a faint galloping sound grew louder and louder, until Nagzz saw a bright green deer running toward him.

"Arrghhh!" He screamed

"Really?" The deer asked, in a very Canadian voice.

"Moose can speak in this world?" Nagzz stuttered.

"I'm not a moose, or a deer, I am a caribou!!" She shouted.

"Huh?"

...I don't know looks pretty deer like to me.

"Ughh I now regret bringing you here Nagzz." She said.

"Who even are you?" Nagzz asked, somehow still blindingly oblivious as to who this very canadian moose, deer, caribou or whatever the cult leader is supposed to be, is.

"Wow I am hurt Nagzz." She replied with a bit of a sniffle. "I guess you'll recognise me in my human form."

A bright green light shone from within the creature and she transformed.

Beautiful. Nagzz thought. (please refer to the, Nagzz compliments size sheet.)

Before him stood Haruka Karibu in all her green Canadian beauty.

"Haruka!? don't tell me you got sniffed into this hell hole as well!"

No I didn't bring her here, there's no chance I am messing with the seed of life.

"Yea I saw this place and thought it looked interesting, so I decided to check it out." She explained. "When I found out you were here, I thought I'd bring you to me so we can catch up. I failed once though because I didn't have enough Kent, so I collected some more and now here you are."

"You needed Kent to summon me?!!..WHAT THE FUCK voice!"

Hey it was funny so don't worry about it.

"Tsk. This hellscape is far from interesting. Especially with this voice in control of everything" Nagzz complained. "I've been stuck here for ages now. Cursed to find cow's milk before I can leave."

"Huh? That sounds like it sucks." Haruka dismissed.

"Ohh if you're looking for cow's milk I heard that there's a city in the Ruof Deah desert that's a mecca for music. It attracts thousands of people as this world's most popular holiday destination. Any bet someone there can tell you where to find cow's milk."

"Ohh that's actually great advice. Thanks Haruka."

"What do you mean by, actually great advice?"

"..."

"Don't worry about it." Nagzz dismissed, looking at the ground. Haruka squinted her eyes suspiciously at him. "But how will I get there? Even with GPS I get lost. I will be doomed to wander the surface of this place for eternity."

"I'm sure if you ask the voice kindly he will drop you off." Haruka suggested.

Yeah no his suffering is far too enjoyable to watch.

"See!"

"Mr Crow sir please would you be so kind as to drop Nagzz off close to the city?" Haruka asked politely, batting her large adorable eyes into the sky.

As you asked so kindly, your wish is my command.

Nagzz suddenly found himself surrounded by a sweltering hot sea of sand.

"Huh?... Where's the city?"

She said to drop you off close to the city...and you are close....kinda.

"FUCK YOU SUMMON!"

It's pronounced, some crow, and I prefer Crow.