𝐌𝐲 𝐌𝐮𝐬𝐞

【18】

A few more days passed after going to Semi's place. Y/n has been off ever since we left. I'm not sure what happened, but I didn't want to ask her either.

What matters is the very last performance- or you could call it a gig. I'm not sure a lot of people are going. It's in a few days. We have to get the band back together for rehearsals. After that, I can't say what's going to happen with the band. Maybe I'll get kicked out. That has a high chance of happening.

It hurts seeing her down like this. She's in her room right now. I'm not sure if I want to knock on the door and have a little chat with her. I just want to know what's going on.

"Suna" I hear the bedroom door crack open and her head poke out. "Yeah?" She proceeds to walk out the room and into the hallway to me. She stands right in front of me. "What would you do if you saw the person you loved with someone else?" Fuck well I wasnt ready for that question. Though I already knew the answer.

I'd go after them and win them back. Obviously. I looked up at her and could see tears in her eyes. Was she about to cry? Please don't cry. "Come here princess. What's bothering you?" I opened my arms to let her rest on me. She hugs me. Putting her head on my shoulder.

If Semi did this to her. He is no better than me. I don't think he realizes what he lost. I wasn't losing you again. I promise. "I- Where did I go wrong? Everytime." She lets out a sob.

[Play: K. - Cigarettes After Sex]

I when I noticed that you me back

We were down in a waiting for the check

"Semi- he... this girl came into the apartment a few days ago. He didn't tell her to leave. I walked out. I couldn't do it, Suna. I couldn't"

We had made love that day with no attached

But I tell that had how you at me then

She was hurt. She loved Semi. Not me. I wasn't the guy she loved anymore. Those times we shared together were gone. Locked away, where no one else could find them. Only my memory, hidden.

Kristen, come back

I've been for you to slip back in bed

When you the candle

I'd wait for you to come back home every night. Even if we fought. Because you'd come back. Even if I was the one hurting you over and over again.

And on the East Side you're with me now

And I'm pictures of you with on the wall

That one time we went on a date. At the beginning of our relationship. It was so pure. Before me hurting you. Before me, leaving you behind and being the worst person in your life. Before becoming toxic and blaming everything on you.

Think I like you best when you're in from head to toe

Think I like you best when you're just with me

It was true. I just didn't want anyone else to be with you, but you realized you deserved better. You truly did though. I wasn't good for you. Semi was- to some extent. But I wanted you with me...

And no one else

I was selfish. "Well princess, some people chase the one they love. No matter how much they hurt them. Others give up and keep it to themselves. Some people move on... and others don't give up" I look at her. She doesn't realize.

Kristen, come back

I've been for you to slip back in bed

When you the candle

I came back. Just for you. I didn't realize how much I lost until I lost you. I didn't intend to lose anymore. "Just like I did. I lost someone I loved. I came back, but they are in love with someone else. There's nothing I can really do than admire and love from afar, princess" She raises her head. "That sucks" she lets out a small laugh, putting her head on my shoulder again.

And I'm you in my room

Holding you you fall asleep

Just like the day we reconciled. When we got to know each other again for the first time in years. In the end you fell asleep in my arms. Did you feel comfortable to be around me again? I would hope so. It was probably one of the best nights.

And it's just as good as I knew it be

Stay with me I don't want you to leave

I'm hoping you'll stay. At least for a little longer. I know I fucked up really bad in the past, but I'm working on it. I know my apologies meant nothing at one point. I truly mean it now. It's not me trying to manipulate you to keep you in my life anymore. I feel like the guy you fell in love with when we first started dating. Not the one who'd go out and hurt you.

Kristen, come back

I've been for you to slip back in bed

When you the candle

Please stay a while. I want to keep holding you. Until the end of time. I don't want to lose anymore.

"Suna, did you ever love me?" I was taken aback. "Yes. I did. I always did. Even after I became that toxic person. I still do" I said that last part under my breath. Maybe she'll hear it or not. Nothing I could do to change her mind from Semi anyways.

"Do you still have something for me?" She looked at me. Yes. I do. I love you. "I think you should go to sleep, love. It's late and we have a show tomorrow plus set up before" I picked her up. Walking into the bedroom. Laying her lightly on the bed and giving her a light forehead kiss.

I closed the door behind me. Grabbing my notebook and putting some finishing touches on a song I was writing. 

I'm back. This one was uh. Interesting. Anyways. Two more chapters and I'm finally done. I've been so busy with school and rehearsals. I hope you enjoyed. Please don't forget to vote. I love you guys <3