Throughout my life there has been thousands of ups and downs and at one point after my first ex starting to stalk me and threatening my friends I started getting to the lowest point I ever had when I was around 12 and starting my first year of high school was a living nightmare. Not to blame any of the people there in fact I loved the people there with all my heart, yet my group was split into two halves and it kinda just stopped after that and it was too much for my mental health to the point I couldn't survive going to class without being struck with an uncontrollable feeling of fear, pain and just flashbacks to the point I couldn't move or do anything.
The next year I left absolutely everyone i loved and started doing distance ed which was where I could choose what I worked on and studied on my own time which was the most beneficial thing ever!!
I worked so hard for years to stay in that school since it was at home and it helped me develop so much as a person yet I was isolated so my main support was getting to venture across the forest at my home since I live on a mountain.
The trees towering over the sky, mushrooms adding colour and light to a world that seemed so dark and lonely and the bird dancing and singing in a constant spiral forever fills my brain with joy and it's something I never wanna lose, it is apart of my soul and being someone of white skin in a land that was walked only walked on by the aboriginals I forever will feel honoured to live here but yet also feel such guilt and shame by my ancestors for what they did to the original dwellers of this land.
Years go by and I was forced to go back to face to face school and all of my years of fighting, struggling and doing everything in my power went down the drain which I will always cherish the days I had in freedom but now I have a new friend group and I do love them so much.
My soul can't be ignored tho and due to the fact all of my councillors I had to leave or they avoided me, I couldn't get the support I needed after so much pain constantly banging on my chest and I needed a distraction from the memories.
In memory of the time I had and in need of something that brings me joy and trains me to gain strength to defend myself in my future I decided to support my family and make a source of food for them at home.
So the journey begins to create my dream garden.
YOU ARE READING
My garden <3
RandomThis is really just talking about what this garden means to me and what made me start it.
