Pleasing (H.S)

twenty four

Iris

We are back to America. I didn't miss it at all. I liked how we were back home. We had a morning routine, we ate lunch all together with our friends in London and we even had a night routine, that ended every time with a lot of laughter and smiles.

Emma loved every second of our stay in London and Manchester. She loved that everyone was talking like her and that she had to spend everyday with people that were doing everything she demanded. She told us that she loved Harry's mother and sister because after our time in Manchester, we spend a few time on Harry's mum's home in Holmes Chapel. Anne was so excited to have a little kid on her house after all of those years and she had everything ready. She taught Emma how to plant some flowers and their names and she even let Emma paint the most of her ceramics. Anne is a master in pottery. She's using it as a hobby but I can tell that she is very talented. By the time we left her home, all of her creations were colorful and she was promising Emma that the next time we visit, she will take her with her in a class so she will learn how the plates were made. Emma loved it there. She played with the cats so much that I'm sure the poor creatures are glad that we left. She managed to learn all their names, unlike me who can't tell which cat is named Evie and which Dottie. 

Harry was so happy that he got to take us around his old neighborhood. He took us to the old bakery he used to work, the café that he and his old friends went after school and on the weekends and he even took me to his favorite record store. He has a few friends that stayed in this old town but most of them got a way to get out. There is a conversation that I will never forget. 

We were walking down the road from his mum's house. We were alone, Emma decided to stay with her friend Annie and the cats so we decided to go out for a while because here we aren't afraid that someone may see us. Harry was telling me all of his memories from when he used to live here. I listened to him with attention because his voice was low like he was confessing me a secret. 

"I will never find my way back here." He says to me. "I left so young and now all the people I grew up with are looking at me like I'm a stranger." 

I pout at his words. "What do you mean, darling?" 

He takes a deep breath and tries to find the words to externalise his thoughts. He doesn't even look at me, he is looking in front of him and I swear that he is about to cry. 

"They think of me like I'm Harry Styles and they forget that I'm Harry too. I mean I left when I was 16 and never came back. I didn't go to any of their graduations, not because I didn't want to but because I was miles away. I wasn't here when my friends were breaking up with their partners and when they were finding out that they were pregnant. As the years go by, I lose contact with almost everyone. I'm not invited to the weddings, I'm not invited to Saturday gatherings to the pub down this road. And all of that because I'm me." He confesses and leaves another breath. His voice is trembling. "And now, I'm just standing in the pavement in front of the most beautiful woman I know and I embarrass myself." He says and tries to hide his face. 

"Hey," I try to get his attention the way I use to get Emma's when she's upset. "It's normal to feel like that. I can't imagine how it is because I was the last one of my friends to get away but your feelings are valid, H. You were just a kid and you were overworked. You never had time for "normal" activities. Nobody can understand how it was back then. The actions of the past have a lot of consequences to the future, I know it. Try to find a way of communication with your old friends now that we are here. You can always catch up and let them know. I'm sure that they understand. Don't beat yourself that you weren't there for them, that's just life." I try to tell him and he just hugs me putting his head at the crook of my neck.