Mist and Mystery at Calormen's Grove

The Heart's Choice

16. The Heart's Choice

The world around Susan swirled round and round like a ferris wheel under water. The sensation created a vacuum around her heart and her chest constricted by each breath of air she attempted to take. She could only compare it to the sensation you have when you remain beneath the surface so long that it feels as if your chest is going to implode.

For a second there was nothing else on Susan's mind but the hysteria which slowly crept upon her for each breath she could not take. Somewhere far away she thought she heard echoes of a man's voice, but it was so weak she couldn't be entirely certain of anything.

Then, without warning, everything stopped abruptly. The world stopped turning, the pressure against her chest seized and Susan felt she could break through the surface once more, no longer fearing her soul's implosion.

In relief she drew in a couple of deep breaths and opened her eyes slowly, as if she was a newborn doing both for the first. She had to blink a couple of times before the haze around her cleared.

What she had expected to see, from her last memories, was the gardens at Cair Paravel, the dark night sky full of sparkling stars over her head and a Calormene lord leaning over her with a glinting dagger. What she awoke to was something completely different. Up above her head was a pale, wooden roof. She frowned to herself and quickly turned her head around to understand her peculiar whereabouts. Where in Narnia could this be?

She was lying atop of a hard bed in a small bedroom with pale, naked walls. Outside the window she distantly heard the sound of cars passing by on the road while honking fervently to one another. The photograph of herself and her siblings that stood neatly on the nightstand beside the bed was another piece of the puzzle. Susan didn't need to think about it twice. This wasn't Narnia.

The young woman once more felt her heart constrict in pain, as if someone was clenching it tight in their fist wishing to crush it entirely. Her breaths came shorter as Susan curled up on her side atop of the covers of the bed. Her whole body rocked as she sobbed uncontrollably.

Caspian stepped back in complete silence and watched the majestic lion approach the queen's body. Aslan had appeared out of thin air and claimed he could help her. The king trusted the lion to no end and so now gave him room to aid, though did not move too far away. When Aslan stepped towards Susan and held his great head above her serene face, the Telmarine had been unsure what to expect as he silently tried to control his shaking breaths.

From what he remembered from his books and what the Pevensie siblings had told him of the lion's powers, he believed Aslan was giving the queen the breath of life. Or at the very least, attempted to. For whatever reason, Susan did not stir at all beneath the lion's tender care.

After several more minutes in silence, Caspian knew the lion's work was to no avail. He felt an indescribable feeling fill his chest and he fell to his knees in the grass with no more power to hold him up. For all the muscles in his arms and legs, he did not have the strength for this. His entire being trembled as pain seized in his heart and his lungs heaved in shock. Words got caught in his throat, as he tried to push through the fear, "...Is she dead?"

The young king closed his eyes tight as he waited for Aslan's reply. Everything around him was quiet, as if tree and bird alike, too, wished to know the answer. When no response came, the Telmarine ran a hand across his dark hair and sank closer to the ground. In a whisper, he begged, "Please, don't let her die, Aslan. If Susan died, I don't... I couldn't..."

"I know," was the lion's simply, calm reply. Caspian opened his eyes then and gazed up at the lion, who in turn had turned from Susan to look at the king with an unreadable look on his face.