Silver Lining

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It's late at night, much too late for any sane person to still be awake.

Felix sits with his back against the frame of the guest bed, face buried in his hands and the occasional hiccup escaping him as tears slip through small fingers and drip from his chin.

It is quiet despite the sniffles, as well as the soft breaths that leave the slumbering alpha. The crickets have disappeared for the season, taking their song with them; the frogs have burrowed deep in yet-to-be-frosted mud in an attempt to escape the bitter cold. A clock silently ticks on the wall but its presence is not loud enough to disturb the thick, dark cloud of isolation that has seemed to swallow the omega whole.

Here, in the dead of night within a room ridden with grief and sadness; here, crying beside his injured sleeping friend much like he did months ago for his hyung, Felix is reminded just how alone he is.

He is reminded that all of those around him get hurt; he causes nothing but harm and trouble and death, for humans and werewolves alike.

And for an alpha so tough, so stubbornly persistent and with a heart big enough to encompass the entire world... It makes the pain of these reminders that much worse for Felix.

Bang Chan isn't supposed to lay upon sheets only whiter than the bandages wrapped around his torso; Bang Chan isn't supposed to have thick gaus and medical tape covering his no longer unmarred tan neck; Bang Chan isn't supposed to have a thin slit in his skin stretching from his left cheek bone to his right, dividing his face in half and staining the shine on the bridge of his nose red.

It will scar, all of it will scar. His body, a once unpainted canvas of innocence, now displays the marks of an old wounded warrior; the blood feels like it's on Felix's hands, the corrupted figure feels like it's from a burdensome omega's doing.

He may not have cut the leader up or battered an elderly man sleeping above a flower shop, but he set the stage for them both.

What if Chan's vocal cords are permanently damaged from this feral encounter? What if Lee dies in the village because there is no one there to help him?

What if the silvernette just escaped into the mountains, never to be seen again? Would everyone be safe? Would everyone be happy?

If Chan is never the same again, never able to wake up again... Would Felix crack under the regret of keeping his most important of confessions unspoken and unshared?

"But I will always protect those I love."

He has taken advantage of the Skz pack leader's patience thus far, hasn't he? Used wariness as an excuse for selfishness? He knows exactly how Chan feels about him yet-

He stills as the door opens, a small gasp leaving him before he's quickly transforming to hide his tears among thick silver fur. A raven-colored snout peeks through, then an umber, and then a white and a ginger and a blonde. There's a creak of hinges as a black head soon follows, knocking the other wolves off balance as they all go tumbling through the doorway and onto the floor with an unceremonious thump.

Felix stares for a moment, all of them staring back, but then he takes the hint that perhaps they didn't know he was in here, that perhaps he isn't wanted in here; after all, he caused the sorry state that their alpha is in.

He's not Chan's mate, he's not even part of the pack; the last place he belongs is here in this room with all of them during a rough time. Especially after he disobeyed their code and intervened in the battle, even if it was to save their leader's life... Even if he killed their leader's opponent with cold-blooded revenge on his mind...

He cowers submissively, probably for the first time since he arrived here in the summer; ears pin to his head and he backs away from the alpha's bed side to allow them space.

But then the strangest thing happens, something that tilts Felix's entire world upon its axis: the Skz crowd him in the room, blocking the exit, and then Jeongin tackles him to the floor.

The others join in with small playful yips and content wags of tails; Minho nuzzles his neck and Jisung licks his cheek and Seungmin lolls out his tongue and Hyunjin releases a short howl and Jeongin cuddles into his side and Changbin drags in pillows and blankets from the hallway to stuff in the gaps left between the many canine bodies.

The pack has formed a dog pile upon him, and while it had initially startled Felix enough to freeze upon the floor, he now utterly melts under the welcoming affection.

If he was human, he'd start crying again; this time, with tears of relief and happiness.

Because here, under the comfort of a pack he has never once thought to call his own, the lone omega has never felt so seen.

Valued like, maybe... Maybe with all the dynamics and politics aside, they were destined to be one big family.

"Sleep, Freckles."

And maybe they could be. He just has to let them in.

So sleep he will.