Luke sighed as he paced back and forth across his living room. He rubbed his tired eyes looking toward his living room clock, it read 4:32 AM. He'd only had Penelope for 2 weeks, yet it had felt like 2 months. He was exhausted, he had put Penelope to sleep for the third time that night, about 30 minutes ago. Now he was up worrying about what to tell his mom when she comes to visit tomorrow. He had invited her over a week ago to tell her about Penelope, but now he was regretting calling her. He was a 19 year old boy working as an assistant teacher at an elementary school, finishing his collage classes online. He had no time or money, yet looking at Penelope he knew none of that mattered. She needed a family, so he was going to be her family. He was just worried about telling his mom this, he needed her support, heck he just needed a hug from her, to tell him everything was going to be okay.
These past two weeks had been a nightmare, a beautiful nightmare. There were times where Penelope was a smiley little baby, content with drinking her milk from a flimsy bottle bought from the 99 cents store. However, there were other times where she was inconsolable, crying, screaming and thrashing about. Times when he didn't know what would make her happy.
He had tried to do everything right. The night she had shown up on his doorstep he ran to the store and picked up all the baby things he could think of; diapers, bottles, baby clothes, formula, baby powder, toys, pacifiers, car seat, crib, and feeding chair. He might not have done everything right, but it's the thought that counts right? The only thing that he had done wrong so far was during her first car ride, he put her in the front seat still in her woven basket. But, he made sure that he bought the car seat first, throwing the old worn woven basket out. Besides the car incident everything was done safely. He sterilized all her toys and bottles, baby-proofed his apartment, and swaddled her in her blanket every night so she wouldn't scratch her face during her sleep. He had gone and bought 20 single parenting books, done online research, he even went to a parenting class. He wanted to do this right, he wanted Penelope to grow up in a loving stable home.
At the beginning he wasn't quite sure about raising a baby, let a lot one that was not technically his. But as time went by he realized that, even in this short amount of time, he couldn't picture a life with out her. He loved her, with all of his heart.
Yes, it's been extremely difficult raising a baby, he had to call in 'sick' for a few days at his work, he had to blow off his friends multiple times, telling them that he was 'to busy to hang out'. Yet, it's been worth it, and he was exited about watching his little girl grown up to become a beautiful lady.
At 7:00 AM his alarm went off. Luke enjoyed waking up early every morning, that is, when he actually gets sleep. But lately his sleep schedule had been completely shattered.
Two more hours and his mom would be here. Two more hours and he would show Penelope her grandmother. Two more hours until Liz would find out that she is a grandmother. Two more hours until he would tell someone that he is a dad.
Luke kicked at his coffee table, unsure of what he felt. He was happy, sad, anxious, and exited all at the same time. He felt like he was going to burst at the seems.
He figured that he wouldn't be getting any rest soon, so he might as well get dressed for the day. He bounded up the stairs toward his room, stumbling slightly on the last step. He found a pair of black jeans on his ottoman and a blue t-shirt hanging in his closet. He put them on slowly, then went to wash his face. Once he was done he went back down stairs to brew his coffee.
Time seemed to wither away. Luke was sipping on his last drops of coffee, looking at the clock again, 8:56 AM. A few more minutes and his mom would show up. He didn't know how to start talking to her about Penelope. What was he to say? 'Oh hey mom, just thought you should know I'm a father now!' That didn't seem to be the brightest idea.
Luke took in a deep breath as he heard his mothers soft knock on the front door. He put on a cheerful smile and opened his front door.
"Luke, honey it's so great to see you!" Liz greeted her son hugging him and quickly pecking his cheek, before walking into his living room. "How have you been? I feel like I haven't seen you in months!"
"Mom, it's been a few weeks, calm down, I'm fine. please sit down, do you want something to drink?" Luke waved his mother toward his couch as he made his way into the kitchen.
"Water would be great." Liz called out as she looked about his flat noticing certain changes about. She found it peculiar that all of the sharp edges on chairs and tables had a foam covering on them. Nothing was throw about. Usually Luke would have an old dish laying about, or a pair of pants thrown across the couch. Yet there was not a speck out of place. Everything was cleaned pristinely.
"Okay here you go, one water." Luke handed his mother the glass then sat down next to her taking her free hand.
"So mom, I don't really know how to go about this, or explain it to you, but I'm going to try and do my best." Luke quietly stated as he looked down at their intertwined hands. Liz just squeezed his hand in a comforting manor, politely telling him to continue.
"My life has changed pretty drastically in the past month. And it will forever be changed, as will I. I feel as though I have become a completely new person, a better person than I was. And I would like your support with everything I'm about to tell you. However, if you don't agree that's fine too. But I have made up my mind on what I want to do, and who I want to become as a person." Luke took a deep breath and tried not to show his nervousness.
"Honey, you know I will always support you no matter what. Now tell me, what is it?" His mom rubbed his back comforting him.
"Stay right there." Luke mumbled as he got up. He quickly made his way to his bedroom, gently picking up Penelope from her crib, trying his best not to wake her. She stirred slightly in her sleep, wiggling in his arms. He rocked her back and forth while walking back to the living room. His mother was sat facing away from him, fiddling with her watch. He smiled slightly as he walked over behind the couch.
"Mom I would like you to meet someone, this is Penelope, my daughter."
I'm sorry if this is going to slow for you. However, I want to make sure that I don't skim over some of the details. I feel like these simplistic chapters are important to the story's plot. I want this book to be simi-realistic and not just highlight the really important things that happen, but some of the minor details because life's not all about big important moments, it's about living in the moment, no matter what moment that may be.
-Mads
YOU ARE READING
Doorsteps {muke}
Fiksi Penggemar"He masked the baby's head and dumped her on a doorstep" Lightly based of the song 'This Night Has Opened My Eyes' By The Smiths Part 2 in the Smiths Songs series
