Happy Ending

TWO -

Today was another day, to do the same routine and return to his room to cry.

Or not cry at all. For some strange reason Hoseok couldn't cry, only little tears were dropped from his eyes.

He wished he could cry until there's no more tears, but he can't. He feels like his heart is burning, and it's so bad that the only thing you think is to cry for help, but he can't cry...

And there's no one to help him.

...

Leaving his last class Hoseok takes his earpods out and disconnect from the noisy hallways.

'Hoseok!! Hoseok!!' Someone was screaming his name from behind, but Hoseok was already immersed in the sad and nostalgic song that was playing.

The someone came running through the people and touched Hoseok's shoulder, 'Hoba, i was calling you'

Namjoon.

'Sorry Namjoon-ah, i didn't hear you. Had my earpods on' Hoseok apologized, but why is Namjoon calling him for? They don't speak that much to each other.

'It's okay' Namjoon says catching his breath. 'Anyways, wanna grab a coffee?'

Strange. But i guess i do need a warm and sweet cappuccino caramel.

'Okay'

...

They were now sitting at the cafe, and Hoseok never saw this before, he never noticed it.

'So, Doyun told me you broke up' Namjoon said.

This was the last thing Hoseok was expecting to get asked. His heart did a jump that made him grab the mug even harder, and it hurt, hearing his name hurt.

'Ah, yeah' Hoseok looked down his lap, he didn't want to talk about it but, maybe talking about it was going to feel better.

'He went to my house after you both broke up, he didn't say anything, he was just crying'

Oh.

Then Hoseok told him exactly what Doyun said to him the day he broke up with him.

'That's why i hate church or whatever' Namjoon said sipping on his americano.

'Same, but i respect it, for him and anyone who believes in that'

'But you know that thing is important to him, and maybe that's why, Hoba' Namjoon said.

The look on his eyes was comforting him, was understanding.

'I know that, Namjoon. That's why i never said anything about his belifs and his visit to church and all that shit, but saying that you cannot lie about being in a relationship with a boy because you sing to god and bla bla bla?!' Hoseok said.

'Namjoon, Doyun is not a fucking saint, because before i dated him i knew the things he does and the things WE did together'

'He's not a fucking saint, Namjoon'

Hoseok knows every little thing about him, he knows how he likes to have sex, how he gets turned on, when he masturbates himself, how much he likes to get sucked, where to touch him to make him come.

Hoseok knows every little sin Doyun have committed.

...

Hoseok was now back in his room, again crying, well letting some tears out.

The conversation he had with Namjoon today made him feel a little better, he did needed to talk about it with someone.

maybe writing might help too.

Hoseok grabbed his journal and started to write what he was feeling:

"my happiness is temporary since monday, i don't feel genuinely happy about anything or with anything.

will i be happy again? he made me insanely happy and comfortable of being myself. And he's now why i don't feel happy anymore.

it's day 4, and it hurts like shit, i don't feel like doing anything, i just want him with me. And it hurts that i can't cry to let out all this feelings, only small tears, but not crying.

this year was a rollercoaster, i got a boyfriend, i went out, i moved to another house... and then he broke up with me... everything in one single year.

i don't have anyone... i only have two friends seriously and they have their lives i cannot count on them for everything.

i wished i had a best friend, and i hope you heal, and this chapter pass and you don't notice it.

— Love, Hoseok"