stutter

01. - the stupidest person alive

RORY

I heard that my teammates were laughing about something while they were eating their lunch. I didn't really consider them my friends, except Adam. I didn't even care about the stupid jokes they made. It was usually something dumb. They were average popular boys, talking about girls (or fucking them), video games, alcohol and parties. 

I got some shit from them, because I didn't like parties, and I didn't have a girlfriend. It was supposed be friendly tease I guess, but sometimes it just hurt.

"And there he is!" shouted one of my teammates next to me. They weren't the bully types, but sometimes, when they were seeing someone who was too weird for them, they made a few jokes. "I wonder if he ever feels lonely. Like, he is all alone." 

I frowned as I followed his gaze. 

Mark.

My heart beat like crazy when I saw him, and I felt those stupid butterflies in my stomach. He had the most beautiful brown eyes I have ever seen, with dark brown hair. I had a massive crush on him. He was smart, kind and- 

Okay, I spoke to him like twice so I didn't really know him, but still. He looked like the nicest person on the world. 

"Drop it, Mike," I said, while my eyes were still on him. How could he look so perfect while he was just walking?

"And he arrived! Everyone's guardian angel. Very generous of you, Rory," Mike rolled his eyes. "I'm not even making fun of him. 'm just being curious."

Adam snorted as he looked at us. "Curious my ass," he muttered. "Did you know, that you can be curious and not a dick at the same time? It's amazing!"

Mike said something about Adam's mom. 
"Y'all act like you're better than me. Okay, maybe Rory is better, but I can say at least ten reasons why are you going to hell, Adam."

They argued over my head, but after a while, I ignored them. When I looked up again, Mark disappeared. Sometimes all I could think is how much I wanted to be with him. We would chill in my room, read books (he was weirdly obsessed with classics), drink tea... Is this too much to ask?

When I got home, I greeted my mom with a kiss on her cheek. 

"How was your day?" she asked.

"It was fine I guess," I shrugged. 
I wanted to tell her about my boy problems (can you even call it that?), but I just couldn't do it. I always thought that she wouldn't be pleased with my sexuality- Maybe because she was deeply religious. 

"You seem overwhelmed," she said with a worried tone. 

"It's fine Ma. I promise."

She gave me an 'if you say so' look, and went back to wash the dishes. "Can you go to the store for me, please? Your bother will be home for the weekend, and we don't have enough food for three people."

I sighed. My bother was out to college, so he was usually only home on the weekends, and on some friday. We weren't close, but I knew that I could count on him if I needed so. 

"Tell me what should I buy," I muttered. I hated shopping, especially if I was alone.
Ma smiled at me, gave me some money and lent me her car keys. I got my driver's license as soon as i could, because I hated that my mom was driving me everywhere. She said embarrassing things about me to my teammates, and called me awkward nicknames in front of them. 

. . .

"Where the fuck are the baby carrots-" I muttered to myself as I scanned through the shelves. I got looks because I was talking to myself, but it wasn't my first time. 

"Um- excuse me!" I turned to direction of the voice, and frozed. 

Mark was looking at me, with big eyes, and... Oh my god, please tell me he didn't hear me talking about baby carrots. How did he even get behind me? Or how did I not notice him? Every time I looked at him, he was basically shining. He was truly an angel.

"Oh, hi!" I said, maybe a little too enthusiastic. And loud.

"Can you help me, please? I can't reach the top shelf..." he asked with an awkward smile.

Dimples.

"Yes! I m-mean of course, l-like-" shut up, shut up, shut up. "What- Which thing do you want?" I asked, while making sure I wasn't looking at his eyes. "Um, the diapers? Wait, no-" 

He fucking giggled.

"I want the paper towels, thanks," he smiled at me. 
After I gave it to him with shaking hands, I walked away quickly, not even caring about the rest of the things that I needed to buy.

That was a way to talk to your crush. I bet he thought I was the stupidest person alive.