𝑰𝛮𝐷𝑰𝐺𝛮𝐴𝛮𝑇 ♡

38

||Los Angeles, California📍||
Azaria Nicole Miller

I rubbed my arms that were crossed as I sat in the cold room. Everytime I come here the AC is always fully blasting. I have on a hoodie and some tights but i'm still chilly. I looked at the walls of all the posters with positive quotes and happy things. It makes it almost impossible to feel any other feeling in this room but happiness, and somehow i'm still not feeling it

One thing I love is peace. The way I would do anything to protect my peace..

I feel like i've moved on from the bullshitting era of my life. Where everything was chaos, and the wild life that I secretly loved

But now when i'm faced with bullshit it's like, for what?

I don't even have energy to find an answer nowadays, I just get as far away from it as possible-

"What are you thinking about?" I heard and my eyes darted to Mr Taylor. He didn't look up from whatever he was writing down

"Hm"

"What's going on in that brain of yours, what's it talking about?" He looked at me

"I'm just trying to figure out how i'm supposed to find peace if bullshit keeps happening" I said

"Did you write about it in your notebook?" He asked and I shook my head

"I've been writing in it, but my recent situation, no I haven't got the chance" I told him

"You wanna elaborate or no?" He asked

"Actually, I do" I fixed my posture in the seat

"You got the floor"

"Well, my mom got out of the hospital finally. My dad decided to show up at our house claiming that he wanted to talk to me and my mom. I knew he wasn't gonna leave so I went on the porch to talk. I locked myself out of the house so he wouldn't get inside with my mom who can't really do things on her own, and my best friend who's pregnant" I told him "I texted my best friend and told her when she saw the message to call the police, I just had a bad feeling he was gonna do something"

My eyes were focused on my nails tapping against my leg. I chuckled at the 'nervous tick' Mr Taylor claims that I have. He might have been right about that one little thing

"He put his hands on me and i'm not gonna lie I was scared. I thought that I was gonna die" I said honestly and looked up at him "You wanna know something?"

"What?" He asked

"When he was choking me I had a knife in my hand, I had enough access to stop him right then and there. I mean I thought about it, I wanted to because he was hurting me, but I didn't, and I don't know why" I licked over my lips and shook my head "And it's just like, i'm cool on all this shit. I'm normally the type of person who wants revenge or wanna fight but i'm good, I don't want anything but peace now that he's locked up" I said honestly

"I'm so proud of you. and not only because you had self control and handled that situation better than anyone could have in that situation, but you're opening up. I never thought that we'd be so close to the day where you express yourself to me and open up about how you're feeling" He smiled and I chuckled. Dramatic

"You wanna know why you didn't react? It's because you're true self is beginning to become known and your genuine heart is starting to overpower the tough shields that you've covered it with" He said "Regardless of if you would have reacted in that situation or not I wouldn't be disappointed in you, You did great kid"