MISS YOU! | corpse_husband [Completed]

Chapter 15

"If I were you.- I would've regretted to agree to this song. If i'm honest." I told Amina.
"What? No. Not at all. I.- It kind of opened my eyes." Amina said quiet.
"But I#m.- I know you said you think you are a better person now. But I am not. I am still an asshole. You need to give me time. I don't want to eget back together with you if I am still fucked up." I sighed.
"Will that ever change?" Amina asked me with a raised eyebrow and a cheeky smile.
"Okay. Probably not." I chuckled.
"But I'm still pretty toxic in my head. And I know that I am. And I don't want to do this again, with those things in my head you know?" I told her.
"So.- We're just not talking for 4 years again?" Amina asked me.
"I.- I don't know if I am even alive in 2025." I said quiet.
"So? You're just dead when you're ready or what?" She asked me and I saw her eyes gettig teary again.

"I don't know Amina. I can't tell you." I said and watched her nodding.
"I don't want the next time I see you to be your fucking  funeral baby." She whispered. I watched how she fought the tears.
"Baby?" I asked her.

"I want my baby back." Amina said quiet, while hiding her face in her hands.
"And I don't want you back when.- I don't want you back when you're fucking dead." She cried.
"Let me.- I don't know. Give me a few weeks okay? Then we talk again. I need to to Maya. I need to process the whole day for myself. I-. Okay?" I told her. She nodded and leaned against me. I wrapped my arms around her and gave her the closure she needed. I probably needed it as well.

"Can I see your face? Please." She sobbed. I took a deep breath and took my mask off. My whole body started shaking as she looked up to me. Amina sat up straight and inspected every inch of my face.

She raised her hand. I closed my eyes as I felt her finger at the top of my cheek, where a scar was. I felt her finger tracing along it, down to my jaw. A tear was rolling down my cheek.

"What happened?" She breathed.
"I.- Don't worry about it." I whispered and opened my eyes. Her cheeks were wet. Her eyes bloodshot.
"Please. Tell me."
"I.-Cut. Myself. I saw myself and.- Cut." I stuttered.
"Okay. Thank you." She whispered and backed up.
"I won't leave you behind like this." Amina breathed out.

"You'll need to. I need to figure this whole thing out." I told her and looked down to my hands.
"But, now or in a few weeks it doesn't matte.-"
"No but. Amina. Really. I mean it." I stopped, sighed and took her hand.
"Okay." Amina sobbed and wiped her tears away. 

"I'm sorry. Okay. I'll give you time. I'm sorry. I told you that I won't give you a bitch behaviour. I give you time. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. Don't say that you're sorry." I told her. 
"But I am. I-. Do you.- Do you want me to go now?" She asked me with a big tear in her eyes.

"I.- Really? No. But it's better." I said and she nodded.
"Okay. I'll.- I just grab my jacket and then I am gone. Sorry." She said and stood up.
"Actually.- I am not coming back okay?" Amina added.

"What? No. Amina. No. That's not what I meant. I.- We.- Okay. We..." I took a deep breath.
"We will get back together okay? But.- I just need a few days or a week or two for myself. I still don't even know what the fuck happened today. I just need to think about everything. You know? I want you back Amina." I told her.
"Okay." She sobbed.

"Do you.- I know that's weird now. But.- It's almost one in the morning. You can sleep here. I insist actually." I stuttered.

"Are you sure?" She asked quietly.
"I insist. Really. I am not able to sleep anyways. I.- Come with me." I sighed and went into the bedroom. I rummaged through my clothes and found some that were clean.
"Here. You can wear them. Uhm.- In the fridge should everything you'll need and.- if you need to shower.- I guess.- I." Gasped as I felt Amina's lips on mine.
"What the fuck." I said and pushed her back.
"Sorry." She said.

"What was that about huh?" I asked and felt a sudden rush of anger.
"I'm sorry."
"You're sorry for what? You are giving me that bitch behaviour you talked about. And I don't like it. You shouldn't have done this." I said and just left the room.

I grabbed a bottle of wine and just drank the rest of it.

"Amina?" I yelled and shortly after she came out of the room.
"I'm sorry." She sobbed. She was crying.
"Why-." I took a deep breath as she stopped walking right infront of me.
"Why'd you do that? What was that for?" I asked her.
"I don't-. I didn't wanted to upset you." Amina said and wrapped her arms around me.

"Hey." I said and placed my hand on her cheek to guide her up so she would look at me.
"It was much today. And-. Seeing you after that long time. Torturing myself because I missed you to death-. That was just a bit too much for me. If I were you-. I would've probably done the same. Just-. Don't feel bad right now okay?" I told her. Amina nodded and hugged me again.

I gently pushed her head against me and hugged her tight. It was a beautiful feeling. And just this moment, it proved me again. I needed her to heal. I needed her to be happy.

"Alright. Do you-. Do you want to sleep now? I will be here." I said and Amina nodded.
"Alright. Goodnight." I said and just before she got out of my arms, I placed my lips on her temple.

The smile she gave me reminded me at the first time I kissed her forehead. A smile full of hope and thankfulness.
I smiled at her as she turned around to walk to the bedroom.