From birth our life is planed out.
For you everyone else already knows what's best for you.
You try to ignore everything
but its hard.
You go home and just sleep the pain away
when you wake up it still hurts.
You wish that everything can change that it will change
until one day you go to sleep and don't want to wake up.
You wish you could stay sleep,
that where your safe at,
its where you dream of a better tomorrow,
but when you wake up you don't want to do anything.
You realize that your life has no meaning,
you inflict pain on yourself,
it helps the problems,
you feel better,
The only reason your happy is because
your dying
you've bleed out.
You were tired of all the bull that the told you,
everyone said that things were gonna change,
that its okay,
that you had someone to talk to,
but when you tried you didn't know how to express yourself,
so they all stopped trying to listen
and started to judge,
and you finally stopped trying to talk.
You just sat there and slept and cried in your room.
Was I depressed I stopped to think,
as I stood there over MY own dead body.
Nobody cared I thought,
nobody's gonna care,
I don't.
I'm finally happy
I'm gonna be with my long gone family
I grew wings and flew away to a happy place
when I get there I ask God
"why"
he said "why what"
I asked "why why did you let me suffer for so long"
he said "because when you finally got to a happy place you'd know what it really felt like"
I laughed in sorrow and sadness
he asked what's wrong
I said nothing
he looked at me as if I were lying
he said I know what's wrong it I want you to tell me
I said what is happiness
he said you'll know soon
that's when I wake up from a sleep in the hospital
I looked around confused
I did I died I cut myself and bleed out
my mom said "no honey you sent into cardiac arrest"
I said "but I met God"
she said "yea, you did you died for a minute"
I said "oh" and mumbled "I wish it was for good"
my mom said "why, why would you want that"
I said because "I'm not happy here
I just want to die
I have no meaning in this world
I DON'T MATTER"
she looked at me sad and worried
she said "why didn't you tell anyone
I said because no one wanted to listen"
she said "I would've if you just came to me"
I yelled "I TRIED I TRIED TO TALK TO EVERYONE
NO ONE WANTED TO LISTEN"
she turned her head and looked at the floor everyone did
I got up and cried
the room went silent and no one said anything
my mom asked "do you want help"
I said from "who? You
I don't want help or need help
I can do it on my own"
