Twisted Desire

Chapter 9:

Mads perspective:
Fuck. What did i do? What did he do. He's laying there so peacefully sleeping, but what he told me keeps repeating in my head.
I can't believe this. I told myself i wouldn't, i would focus on school but no. Of course. It's not like i'm not happy, of course i am. I have him.

Fuck i'm so fucked.

Stirring came from the bed. He was waking, finally. Do i stay? Do i go? Thousands of thoughts raced through my mind, i needed to make a decision soon.
"Mads?" Leo mumbled half- asleep.
Shit. I couldn't escape now, i had to stay.
"Yeah?" I said quietly, hoping he'd fall back asleep.
I was sat on my bed, he was on his. Although we were the same distance we had been since we got here, it's never felt closer.

"Mads what happened?" he said, confusion muffled his voice. I don't know if i should feel relieved or upset. He didn't remember. I've always heard drunk words are sober thoughts, but what if they weren't? What if i was feeding on this delusion?

"Do you not remember... anything?" i said, shocked.
"i mean i remember..." he recalls everything that happened before the dorm. He forgot it. He forgot his confession. He forgot me taking care of him. He forgot it all.  I wasn't going to remind him, just incase.

Leos Perspective:
Fuck. My heads spinning like crazy and i haven't even opened my eyes properly. What did i do? My mind racked to find answers, but nothing was there. 
"Mads?" I said as my eyes found hers. She was looking at me. My arms moved to the side of my head. Shit that hurts. What happened to my arm? There was a clean cut, like i... punched someone? I remembered everything except for how i got home or what happened afterwards. What if i did something stupid? Or worse, said something stupid?

"Mads what happened?" i said quietly.
I told her what i knew but she was quiet after that.

Flashback:
"Hey finn man, you okay?"
"Not fucking really man, i was so close to her and you stole her."
i just stood there, shocked.
"She looked like she would have been good aswell, fuck you man."
I just saw red.
"Don't you fucking talk about her like that, she isn't just a toy for you to play with and she wasn't yours for me to steal." and with that my fist collided with his jaw.
"Grow some respect man."

Oh shit. I hit finn. Well, i think i did a lot more damage then just hitting him. Mads wouldn't hold eye contact with me, nor tell me what had happened. I knew i had fucked up.

Later on:
All i could think about was what mads tasted like. Although i was very much not sober, i lingered in my mouth. I remembered every touch, every smell and every word. So did my dick, apparently.

I practically spent the whole day in bed, with some exceptions to make a pot noodle and a large glass of iced water. Maddie wasn't in the dorm the whole day, i figured she was avoiding me. Whatever i did, i fucked up.

Click. Maddie was home, and so was my memories?

Flashback:
"Do you wanna know what's wrong huh? I'm sick and tired of pretending like i don't like you? Like it doesn't pain me to watch you go kiss some random guy, so i fuck random people to try and get my mind off you. Do you know what i think off when that happens? you maddy, all i think about is you. I try and act like i hate you because i know i don't have a chance. i know you don't like me. But it's really fucking hard when i live with you, when i am kissing you one minute and next punching some guy cause he shit talked you. Look what your doing to me mads. It hurts."

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I really said that. Mads had looked like she swallowed a lemon when she saw me this morning, that must be why. And i didn't remember anything. Oh shit. That's why she's upset. I need to say something but i didn't know what. Thoughts raced around my mind.

She looked so gorgeous. Her sweatpants hung lowly on her waist, her stüssy zip up matched perfectly. She truly suited everything. We caught eye contact for approximately two seconds, but that was enough for a flutter of butterflies to enter me. She really didn't know what she was doing to me.

"Mads, We need to talk." i said quietly, ignoring the flare of heat rising through me. I gestured for her to sit next to me. I was panicking.

A/N:
Hey my lovelies, i'm so sorry for not posting recently i actually don't have an excuse but have just been busy. I will try and post atleast once a week! This chapter is basically a filler for something very exciting in the next! Enjoy baes 💗
Mrs Mathers 🫶🏻🫶🏻