Slow Dancing & Apple Pie

Eighteen

Once again, you woke up feeling like a pair of living furnaces surrounded you. Soaking it up for a moment, you kept your eyes closed, snuggling yourself against Steve's side and resting a hand on the arm Bucky had tossed over your waist. Lazily, you let your mind wander over the memories of the night before; of the intensity, the connection, the pleasure. Warmth spread through you, soft and soothing so that you basked in the knowledge you were with your mates.

It's not like I fucking wanted to claim her. It just fucking happened.

The memory of the words, shouted in anger and disgust popped unbidden into your head. And just like that, the happy warm feeling inside of you burst like a soap bubble. Bucky claimed you, and the claim was settling just like Steve's had. But Bucky didn't actually want you. The only reason he mated with you was because his instincts pushed him to it, just because you were an omega.

Bucky didn't like or want you. The only reason he was here was because of Steve. You were just the irritating mate that the person he really wanted happened to have. His claiming of yours was an accident he never wanted. Tears stung your eyes, and you carefully extracted yourself from between their slumbering forms.

The moment the space you occupied was empty, Bucky was shifting in his sleep, wrapping an arm around Steve's waist instead. Taking the place you'd been. It confirmed what your heart already knew.

Bucky didn't want you.

~*~*~*~

Standing in the blistering hot spray of the shower, you gave yourself permission to cry out the pain that was choking you. You told yourself you had this one moment in time to allow yourself to wallow in the tears. Once you turned the shower off and stepped out, you had to be stronger than this.

Bucky might not want you, but he had still claimed you, and so you'd have to do what you could to make the best of this turn in your life. And there was no way you could allow him to know just how much him not wanting you hurt.

He couldn't know that your heart felt like it had been splintered into pieces at the knowledge that he didn't love you. Bucky said once that he had wanted you as much as he wanted Steve, and you'd been stupid enough to believe it. So stupid in fact, you'd gone and fallen in love with him.

No, he could never know that.

Slowly, you picked up the shattered pieces of your delusions of love and piled them into a wall around that part of your heart that had gone and done the stupid thing. Feeling hollowed out from the crying, sniffling some, you scrubbed your hands over your face and turned your attention to finishing your shower so that you could leave this bathroom and start adjusting to the way things would be now.

~*~*~*~

Bucky woke to a tug on his hair, blinking his eyes open, he grinned a little when he found Steve's raised brow. "Well, good morning to you."

Steve hummed. "Morning."

"Where's our girl?" Bucky asked, rolling away from Steve to his back and stretching a little.

"She's in the kitchen. Likely cooking breakfast."

"Yum."

Images of pancakes, bacon and eggs filled Bucky's mind and he felt his stomach grumble with hunger. The snack he and Steve had both wolfed down last night hadn't been any kind of substantial. And considering he'd come off such a prolonged rut, where he'd barely eaten anything because mating was so much more important, Bucky was starving . And you were a really good cook.

"You know," Steve said, grabbing Bucky's attention again, "the three of us really need to sit down and talk."

"Ah, yeah, I suppose we should."

Steve scrubbed a hand over his hair and stood, glancing around for a pair of boxers, or sweats to throw on. "Since you went ahead and claimed her, we'll have to go through the whole registration process to update the records."

"Right," Bucky said, feeling a little uncomfortable now.

"And you should consider how you want her collar to change to reflect that."

"Why does her collar need to change? I like how it looks."

A little exasperated, Steve looked over at Bucky, "She's an omega, Buck, her collar is a physical representation of her mate. In her case, she has two mates, so she will need her collar to represent that."

"Oh," Bucky said quietly. "I guess I didn't realize it was that big of a deal."

Steve rolled his eyes. "You know, for an alpha you're a bit clueless about things. You should work on that."

Bucky stood in the middle of the room for a minute after Steve left, turning the words over in his mind. Then he sighed and accepted the fact that he was going to need to adjust to a lot of things he never considered before. After all, he'd never intended to have an omega mate, so why would he have paid attention to those things that were unique to that designation?

Sighing again, he tugged his sweatpants on and followed Steve to the kitchen. If he didn't eat something he might be tempted to chew his own arm off or something.

You were setting two plates down on the table when he entered the kitchen, one in front of Steve, who already had the paper open, and one at the spot across from him. When you looked over at him, Bucky gave you a smile. Something crossed over your face and faintly he felt an odd tugging feeling along the slowly building bond. But then it was gone, leaving him confused as he sat down.

"Thanks doll," he said to you.

"Welcome," you responded a little woodenly. "Since you two idiots decided to have a brawl in the living room and left it destroyed, I expect you two to clean it up. And replace the stuff you broke."

Steve's forehead was wrinkled as he studied you. There was something wrong, he could both feel and smell it coming off you. Even though you were trying to suppress it. When you walked by him, he snagged your wrist and pulled you gently to him. Quietly, staring into your eyes, he asked, "What's wrong princess?"

Your eyes shuttered, and he felt it as you shut down the connection between the two of you, pulling back from the bond. "I'm fine. I'm just tired. And I really have to get going. I've been gone from the house for entirely too long."

Steve wanted to push the issue. But he also knew that doing that could make you shut down even further, to the point where you felt the need to retreat and hide from him and whatever it was that was upsetting you. So, he let it lay for the moment. "Alright. We'll take care of the mess we made today. Before you get back."

"Thank you."

Cupping your cheek lightly, he said, "After you're done with work tonight, we need to talk. The three of us. Okay?"

"Yeah, okay," you agreed but Steve felt like your heart wasn't into it. Concerned, but trying not to show it, he kissed you. Feeling you relax a little against him before he broke it and let you go.

He watched you as you gathered up your things and left the apartment, staring at the closed door for a moment before turning to Bucky. "There's something wrong."

"Eh?" Bucky mumbled through the food in his mouth.

"I don't know what, but she's upset and she's trying really hard to keep it from me. Well, from us."

"Oh." It was the only thing Bucky could think to say after he swallowed. That uncomfortable feeling returned, the feeling of being completely out of his element coming along with it. "How are you so good at this shit?"

"What?"

"You know. Feelings and shit?"

"Because I pay attention. You should try it sometime. Now hurry and finish eating so we can clean up the fucking mess we made. I want the place back to rights long before she comes home."