This was requested but they wanna remain anonymous
TW
Y/N POV
"I'm so fucking tired of this" I cried to myself , sitting on the floor behind my bedroom door
"I can't -" I was cut off by my thoughts when my bf dougie called me. I haven't talked to him in 2 weeks . I missed him but I don't know what's been up with me . I cant explain how im feeling, I don't feel anything anymore . Hunger, stress, tiredness, weakness, pain , happiness , i just cant care anymore . I answered the ft called and walked into the bathroom, keeping my camera facing the ceiling the whole time
"ma are you okay?" He asked over the phone
"I'm fine" I plainly replied . He looked stressed and like he hasn't slept in days. I hated knowing that I'm the reason but i couldn't do anything. I wanted to do something but I just couldn't .
"Why you be dodging a nigga?"
"I don't know." I replied reaching into the cabinet above my sink, grabbing a pill bottle
"Y/N what's that?" He asked. I guess he saw the bottle . Oh well
"It's nothing dougie. I love u" I said hanging up . I looked at myself in the mirror and felt disgusted.
"Wtf is wrong with Me ?" I asked myself . My hair was in a messy bun and kind of matted from not being tooken care of. I have curly hair so I couldn't tame it, esp feeling like this . Dougie kept calling me so I put my phone on dnd . I walked out of the bathroom, pill bottle in hand . Looking at myself in the body mirror , i wanted to throw up . I just wanted to be happy again . I got so skinny from not eating , I looked pale compared to the dark complexion I use to be . I was wearing a big oversized gray shirt that I got from dougie with some basketball shorts I stole from my brother .
"Do I really wanna do this?" I asked myself , sitting on the floor .
"no one even cares" I wondered off, goin deep into my thoughts . I was interrupted when I heard my door being banged on . I didn't wanna move .
Dougie pov:
"Fuck ...fuck fuck fuck" i Said To myself , trying to get into y/n house
"Please ma" I Said hoping she didn't do what I thought she did. That's when I remembered that she always kept a spear key under her door Matt . I opened and walked into complete darkness .
"Shit" I Said running upstairs . I tried to open y/n door but it was locked
"ma open the door" I said hoping she would . After she didn't I broke down
"Y/N" I yelled out losing hope
Y/n pov
I sat there with a blank expression. Hearing my bf yell my name broke my heart. I didn't wanna face reality . I just wanted to be left alone . All of the sudden I hear a loud bang and jump up on my bed. I see the door being pushed to the floor and dougie breathing hard in the door way. The pills still in hand.
"ma I thought-" he cut himself off by crying harder
"I'm sorry" I said instantly breaking down . He rushed over to me , hugging me tight. I tried to pull away
"don't go" he said hugging me tighter . We stayed like that for a good 2 minutes . Just crying in each other arms . I needed this
"Talk to me ma" he said pulling away
"I don't know . I've just been feeling numb lately . I can't wrap my mind around how I feel and I'm sorry I just needed time to-" I got cut off by dougie hugging me again. I think to stop himself from crying .
"It's okay ma. You don't gotta be sorry ." He said hugging me . He pulled back and saw the pills in my hand
"Y/n." He looked me in my eyes .
"You wasn't actually gonna-"
"I'm sorry I was gonna do it. I swear I wasn't "
"Give me the bottle"
"Huh? No-" he snatched it out my hand and threw the pull bottle out my bedroom window
"WHY WOULD U" I yelled running to my window
"I've already lost everyone I have. My brother is in jail and I lost my father . I cant loose you , I have no one" he said as his eyes got watery
"I'm sorry" I said hugging him again
A/N
I'm sorry if this isn't good . I rushed thru it cs ion like talkin bout shi Like This .
