"How can I be happy when I've given so much of myself away?"
Being an idol certainly has it's setbacks.
As a leader, Kim Namjoon knows that all too well, but no one could ever prepare him for what BTS would become, because being an internationally f...
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CHAPTER 2: FOREVER = NEVER
It's been 10 months, and I'm still not over him.
Namjoon's thumb hovers over the comment section. He's hesitant to interact at all with the post. It reminds him too much of his own broken heart and everything he's been trying to avoid for the past few weeks.
Thinking better about it, he takes a deep breath and closes the app.
This is the first time in a while he's thought about his ex. Truly thought about her. He's had the occasional intrusive ones but was always quick to shut it down completely.
Lying there, having read that post, he willingly lets the past meet his present in a chilly whisper. Every memory they've had together flashes through his mind, each more heartbreaking than the last. He keeps himself from shuddering but goosebumps travel down the length of his arms. It suddenly feels like he's freezing.
It's strange how even just at the thought of her, she continues to have this hold on him. She steals the warmth right from him, taking him back to a time when their relationship had started falling apart.
Hana doesn't know what the breakup has done to him. His album is only a glimpse of how he's been coping. The moment she hears it, she'll believe, like everyone else, that he's moved on. Only he'll know that he hasn't.
Releasing a heavy sigh, he slides underneath the blankets and waits for sleep to come. It takes hours, but Namjoon remains there with his eyes closed, thinking of the one person he's no longer allowed to have.
×××××××
The hand intertwined with his is small. Namjoon's fingers practically engulf Hana's, but, especially in colder weather, it's perfect.
The situation itself is far from it.
They're sitting in the furthest row away from the screen in the mostly vacant movie theater. Namjoon is covered head-to-toe in black, adorning a baseball cap with sunglasses perched at its brim, an oversized sweater, joggers, and shoes to match. He's trying to be inconspicuous but doing so only makes him look more out of place.
Maybe it's some unspoken agreement that no one approaches him. An idol trying to blend in and have some sort of normalcy in an overbearing industry that knows no boundaries.
Namjoon is positive that several onlookers in the theater have realized who he is because instead of watching the movie, they keep peering back at him.
He knows what they're thinking.
Who's that girl beside him?
This isn't his first time on a date, nor is it the first time that someone has recognized him and known better than to take advantage of the situation. Still, sitting there, the constant staring has Namjoon shift uncomfortably in his cushioned seat.
