Going After Heaven (Mafia Romance)

Chapter Nineteen

I need to end this," I mutter under my breath as he gets to my door.

My chest heaving and my heartbeat vibrates in my stomach.

He stops by the door of my office and the heavy throbbing dies down. The walls of my stomach get a break from the vibration of my heartbeat.

He pulls out his phone and starts speaking into the phone. He can't see me but I can see him. In the same way, I can see everything on this floor and not be seen. From the outside my office walls are tainted gray.

I keep my eyes fixated on Gabriele and everything blurs into the background. My eyes editing the picture focus on him and him alone.

Now he has his free hand dipped into the pocket of his black dress pants and the sleeve of his black button-up shirt folded. He ends the call, dips his phone in his pocket, and rakes his fingers through his sooty curls draping.

As he reaches for my door, my heartbeat picks up speed and I reach for the cup of coffee and down more coffee to help.

"Gabriele" I mutter and clear my throat as he walks in, his height forever making my office small and my neck hurt "Everything good?" I ask concerning the call he was making.

He looks strained and I know it's none of my business, but I am about to dispose of him, so it won't hurt to show care.

Even though I don't think it's necessary because I dispose of people without giving a fuck about how they take the news.

"I'm good," he says in a brusque manner, keeping his eyes on the window of my office.

I set the cup of coffee down and inhale.

"So I have been thinking, you've been crossing the line and I have too, some things need to be set in place" I reach for a stick of cigar on an ashtray on my desk and take it to my mouth.

I was on it before Rosita came in with coffee and cookies. I take a puff, angling myself to deliver the actual punch and set us both free from the cause of each other.

"I am sorry, it won't happen again... Acero" he drawls in that deep accented voice and my heart folds, seizing to beat.

Acero?

If my name Heaven feels at home on his tongue, Acero feels like an alien visiting earth for the first time. Or even worse, a human teleported in his sleep to an alien universe. Like a bitter herb on the tongue of a child.

"You... well..." I chuckle, unable to form a sentence. I had this planned out. I spent most of my night turning restlessly on my bed, thinking of what will be best for the both of us but more for me than him.
I am supposed to dispose of him.

I need to end this here and now. To preserve some respect and dignity for me before this goes out of hand and I have a scandal break just a few days before my death. It won't look good on the news.

Gabriele.." my heart resumes beating but faintly.

"Acero" my heart folds up again, this time stopping the flow of blood to my brain.

I don't know why hearing him call me that feels upsetting and I don't know why I want him to meet my eyes. He always does. He did before I walked into my office this morning. What happened between then and now?

"Gabriele" I drop my cigar on the ashtray and swallow.

"Acero," he says again and I ball my fist.

"Gabriele..." I start to say a sentence and he cuts In thinking I am calling his name.

"Acero"

"To hell with that!" I snap, slapping my desk hard, so hard my coffee cup bounces, spilling, and the rich smell of rum and coffee with it.  The cookies on the plate bounce off to the table too.

"Look at me Gabriele," I say but it's more like a plea.
One minute I want to send him away and now I want him to meet my eyes.

He doesn't and it's upsetting. I want him to. For reasons I can't place, I need him to. But I know he won't.

So be it if this is how we part ways.

"Gabriele you will no longer be nee..."

Helena burst into my office, giggly.

I hadn't noticed her coming because obviously I'd been consumed with the person in front of me that still has his fucking eyes on the window.

"Hey sis, she throws at me" she looks at Gabriele and smiles. "Just the person I was looking for" she moves closer to him. "What do you say to going on a dinner date with me?" She bites down on her lower lip, blushing and giggling.

A lump instantly grows in my lungs, obstructing the free flow of air. My heart picks up ragged beating to keep me alive. My skin heats up, burning.

"Miss Helena I..."

"Helena, call me Helena," she says and he nods.

He breaks his stare on the window and looks at her, and she smiles some more.

"Only if I'm paying for the date, Helena," he says, doing that thing with his voice that makes it so thick and rough you can feel it scald through the tunnel of your ears to your loins.

I gulp, feeling queasy all of a sudden.