The Willows (book three)

Chapter 15

Chapter 16-Ocean's POV:

I sat with Niall and his friends at lunch the next week, rather than sitting alone and we got along pretty well. Sometimes I felt like I was intruding on them because I barely knew them, but that didn't seem to matter as much. It felt good to laugh once in a while and the feeling of not sitting alone everyday lifted my spirit a bit. Niall and I became good friends over the next couple days, since I knew him longer then them, but I became great friends with the girls of the group as well. I started to have them come over often and we'd end of laughing until we cried. I knew deep down in my subconscious that we were friends before my memory became trash, but I suppressed the feeling.

Although the company of my new friends was comfortable, Zayn became the one person out of them all that tried to avoid me as much as possible. Whenever we sat at lunch he'd laugh with us and everything, not completely making it seem like he didn't like me, he simply seemed shyer than the rest of them. Not engaging in any of our conversations, he wouldn't add something or say anything, he would just sit there. Sometimes I would catch him look up at me, but most of the time he'd avoid eye contact as well. I constantly wondered if I knew Zayn, he was familiar like the rest of them were, but ever so often I get a feeling that he's important in some way. The familiarity is much stronger with him, like I would do a favor for him or drive to pick him up in the middle of the night, that's what it felt like. I didn't get a spark though, he was later erased from the list of suspects who might be him. I cared for Zayn, but not that way and I was just going to have to except that the search is going to be hard.

One day, when the house was completely empty and I knew I would be alone for a while. I took a kitchen knife and pricked my finger with it's tip, watching as the cut healed within seconds. I still possessed this odd, unnatural power and I told myself I wouldn't tell anyone.

I never ran into Clemen after that one night. He never bothered to look for me and it wasn't worth my time to look for him either. I didn't even ask around about Emerson, I kept that to myself. I didn't know why I'm keeping it a secret, maybe I'm just afraid because I know he's one of them. 

Everyday I felt afraid about the anonymous person who wanted me dead. I didn't know if I was being followed in public and sometimes I'd take a cautious look around to see if anyone was following me. When the night came my cautiousness grew and the fearful image of being abducted in my sleep came across my mind frequently. I stayed home in the evenings to prevent the attacks from happening, the last thing I wanted was another person to try and get me killed. 

The worst part about everything is that I didn't see Edward in the passing week and I'd be lying to myself if I said that I didn't miss him. I wanted to see him, but I didn't want to be pathetic and go out to look for him. I wondered some days if he hung out with one of the guys sometimes, they seemed to know each other, but he didn't attend school. I didn't ask though. 

I didn't where the anchor necklace, avoiding the piece of jewelry as if it was a toxic chemical. It's mere presence on my desk haunts me when I enter the room, the necklace was a ghost, constantly watching my every move when I'm in it's sight.

I decided I was going to live my Saturday like nothing bad was happening, like I didn't have so many questions I may scream. I wasn't going to live in fear all the time, I am going to take a deep breath and try to act excited about graduation. I am going to study until I can't see and pass my diplomas, I am going to pick out a grad dress, find a date, make memories to replace the old ones and I am going to smile like I'm not breaking down slowly...and it will be believable.

I take my purse from my desk chair, putting my wallet inside and walking downstairs to find Gemma waiting for me in the living room. I'm going out to pick prom dresses, one of the many things I need to do to forget the bad stuff.