Disarm / Rafe Cameron

10. Is This Happiness?

Is This Happiness?
chapter x
warnings: self harm, allusions
to an eating disorder, sex

     LAYNE FELT LIKE HER LIMBS were beginning to break. She had to take her gloved hands off the mop to stretch her fingers, and the muck from pumping out was up to her elbows. Her earbuds were pushed deep into her ears playing Bob Marley and Layne felt, for once, like she was back to normal. Working at the marina was gross and often times embarrassing, but she made good money and it made her feel like a high schooler again—in a good way. Cleaning fish guts off boats and tying them to dock was like nostalgia was crawling up her spine.

"Three little birds...pitch by my doorstep..." she hummed to herself, trying to wring out the mop over the side of the boat. She stared down the side of the boat, and ran her fingers over the letters. Mt. Druther. "Fuck." She groaned, throwing the mop on the boat floor. This was Ward Cameron's boat, and she was fucking cleaning it. She was meeting her boyfriend's family for dinner later that night, and she was here, cleaning their boat.

She didn't hear Ward approach the boat with her ear buds in, the beat thrumming in her ears. She continued to curse to herself and pinch the bridge of her nose in distress until he clapped a calloused hand on her shoulder. Layne nearly jumped out of her skin, quickly yanking the wire of her headphones until they pulled out of her ear and hung down from her pocket.

"Shit, you scared me." Layne's face suddenly went red when she realized she had just cursed and she tripped over the mop, dropping it to the boat floor. Ward retracted his hand, letting out a small laugh and bending down to pick up the mop for her, and Layne quickly fumbled to stuff her headphones in her pocket and paused her music. "Sorry." she murmured, awkwardly shoved her hands in her pockets.

"Just came to move the boat." He held up the keys and jiggled them. "Alberto told me you were cleaning it. Just thought I'd come say hello and introduce myself. I'm Ward—Rafe's father."

Layne chuckled slightly and nodded her head. "Uh—yeah...yeah I know who you are." She laughed, itching the back of her neck, while Ward handed the mop back to her. She leaned it up against the side of the boat and nearly slipped on the wet floor. She was already making such a horrible first impression, she was going to be sick.

"I figured our first meeting shouldn't have really counted." he placed a hand on her arm and Layne tried hard to not retract it. His hand was dry and sort of cold, and she feared he would want to shake her obviously clammy and sweaty ones. Not to mention her hands were nearly covered in muck over her gloves and she smelled like a net full of fish. "I didn't realize when I brought the boat in to get in clean for tonight that my son's girlfriend would be the one cleaning it." He laughed, nudging her slightly, and Layne blushed but put on a fake smile.

"Yeah, well..." she started, staring down at her feet. Layne was most surprised that Rafe had told Ward about their so-called "dinner" tonight and didn't just have her randomly show up like every other time she had gone over there. They had been together for nearly three years and she had never officially met his parents or his sisters, and now she was nearly twenty and felt like she was seventeen all over again.

There was awkward silence and Ward ran his hand over his face. "OK, well...I'll let you go." he rummaged around in his pocket as if looking for tip cash, but Layne shook her head. "No, no, don't worry about it, really." She felt so embarrassed and wanted to shrivel up and die. He probably knew that she was a pogue, with no money, scrubbing rich people's boat as a job and that his son was pity-fucking the poor girl. She wondered if he ever heard when Rafe would yell at her, or if he ever even knew that they were together prior to the summer. Ward must think they just started dating.