That first time.
I moved my head away
I backed off.
It was more than shyness
It was discomfort
It was a lack of consent.
I covered my face
Looked away
But I was backed up
Cornered by you
Against counters.
Your lips were all over
Something I was used to
But now they were too close
I didn't want it.
It was wrong
You were with someone
I wasn't ready
I didn't want sensuality
I wanted safety.
You wouldn't call me.
Told me how you cried
The whole way home
The next morning.
I met you.
Kissed you before I could think.
The fear of losing you
Greater than the fact
It was wrong.
I drove away fast
Distracting myself with anything
I didn't want to think about
How unromantically
I lost my first kiss
To someone I thought
Was my best friend
But now just proved
He was I control
Just another abuser.
YOU ARE READING
Walking Through Hell
PoetryA way to process my trauma. ⚠️‼️ trigger warnings ‼️⚠️ Sexual assault Rape Mental abuse Mental manipulation Emotional abuse
