BOOK OF COMPLETE NONSENSE

My momma be like

mom's sometimes don't talk to you in a loving way I should know but here's a few things my mom has said and some things I heard on YouTube or Vine

expectation:
you:*spills drink*
mom: oh no sweetie what happened please clean this up

reality:
mom : WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED CLEAN THIS UP NOW!!!!!!!

2.
MOM: momma gonna beat yo ass now and when daddy gets home it's gonna be round 2 ding ding

3.
mom: *kicks you over and over*
WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT EATING THE CHOCOLATE! !!!!!

4.

me: I hate it
mom: Fuck you eat the damn thing stupid little asshole

5.
mom: what did I tell you about playing on the phone
What did I tell you about playing in the rain!
WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT PLAYING IN THE FREEZER!!

6.
mom: if yo friend jumps off the building you gonna go too
me: Hell yeah bitch that's ma nigga

7.
mom: my ROOF my RULES

8.
MOM: where you ACT UP is where you get BEAT UP

9.
me : can I have friends over
mom: where they from?
do I know them?
are they in the basement?
are they in your room?
are they gay?
are they boys?
do they swear?

hey people people

So welcome to my 'Diary' about what goes on in my mind or on YouTube and Vine

all credit goes to their respective owners