London Boy | Jamie Flatters

Twenty

When Lilly came back to the room, something felt off. She chose to sit on the side of the bed away from Jamie, who was beside me, leg brushing mine under the covers and had hardly spoken once since getting here, quietly scooting in beside Jack and staying completely silent, something odd for the usually talkative girl, who's known for commentating along to movies with the rest of us, loudly reacting to scenes and laughing along when things got funny.

    Something's wrong. Had her and Jamie's "honeymoon phase" ended already? It'd only been a week. That's got to be some new record. Sometime after our third Christmas movie of the night we all decided to take a break from television, spreading around the suite, blankets wrapped over our shoulders as we did so. Trinity, Jack and Bailey were playing some card game that involved them yelling at the top of their lungs at any moment, while Jamie went decided to brave the cold and take pictures of the skyline, leaving Lilly and I in the kitchen area of the suite, stirring cups of cocoa, while we watched the others play around one with another, Trinity pointing an accusing finger at Jack, who she's sure is cheating.

    When Lilly speaks, I almost miss it, her tone quiet, laced with confusion and hurt, "can I ask you something?"

    Sitting on the chair beside her, I nod, absentmindedly stirring the cocoa in my mug while I do so, "anything."

    "Has Jamie talked to you about us?" I should see the question coming, but it still shocks me, my foot beginning to tap anxiously under the table at the mention of the boy who I secretly loves name.

    "Uh," I place both hands on either side of the mug, the warmth calming my nerves, "not really, no."

    "He completely ran out on me earlier," She explains without me asking further questions. I didn't want to know details of her and Jamie's relationship, yet here we are; somehow, I've ended up as Lilly's closest confidant. "I kissed him when we entered the room," I squeeze the mug tighter in my hands, longing for it to shatter and end this awkward moment. The last thing I wanted was to picture Lilly and Jamie making out. "He's been a bit weird with PDA, but I figured alone, he'd be fine. You know?"

    I take a sip of hot chocolate to avoid answering the question, merely humming in response.

    "I assumed he wasn't a take charge kind of guy," she shrugs, "so I took control... nothing crazy, of course, but he pushed me away..."

    So that's why he'd come in here earlier... and why Lilly seemed so cold toward him when she eventually joined us. "He didn't say anything," I explain quickly, letting her know I'm in the dark just like she is.

    "Do you think you could talk to him?" She questions, reaching over to touch my arm. Her blue eyes were desperate, like I was her only hope. "Ask if I did anything wrong. Maybe I took things too fast?"

    Hot liquid burns my throat as I take another sip, chugging it down too quickly, "Oh, I don't..." I hesitate, shaking my head, "I feel like this is something you should talk to him about."

    "But Jamie opens up to you," She sighs, squeezing my arm again. I want to deny her because that's not entirely true. Lately, it feels like he doesn't; or at least, I haven't been completely open with him. It's getting harder and harder to keep how I feel inside, each passing day getting more and more exhausting. "Please, E. It'd mean a lot to me."

    I sigh, silent for a moment as I think it over. She's not wrong. Jamie is more open to me than anyone else in the group. I was the one he came to when he was feeling anxious. The voice that calmed every panic attack and comforted him when he was hurting. I'm his best friend... and I'm also one of Lilly's. She's counting on me, pleading with me to do this one thing. I can't say no to her, no matter how badly I want to.