Words Amongst Many

- Eight - Leaving -

- Cas's POV -

I stand at the end of the hospital bed looking at everything Dean is hooked up to. IV's. Heart Monitors. Breathing tubes. It almost makes me cry. Michael hasn't showed up yet and it's been an hour. My prediction is that he won't.

I stare at Dean. He is stable.

If I hadn't have let him protect me. And taken the beating. We wouldn't be here. If I hadn't have went to his house. If I hadn't have kissed him. We. Wouldn't. Be here. We would both be okay. Laughing and having fun.

The doctor walks in.
"I have news. It's not the best news." He says.
"Okay." I say shyly.
"Dean is in a coma." He says. I blank out at the word coma. I stare back and forth between Dean and the doctor.
"So?" I ask finally.
"He needs to work the poison out of his system before he can wake up but he can't work the poison out of his system unless he is awake." The doctor explains. I start crying. I stare at Dean and don't move an inch from where I am. The tears come in wretched sobs.

Dean's already dead.

I push the thought of out my head.
"Can't you give him anything?" I ask the doctor.
"One thing. But it's way to dangerous for someone in his state." He replies. I remember Dean giving me advice growing up.

If you don't try, then you'll never know what could have been.

"Give it to him." I say quickly.
"Are you positive?" The doctor asks.
"Yes." I say. I stand back as they hook up one more IV and watch as the liquid drips down the hose. It's halfway empty and Dean jerks violently. His eyes open and he stares at me with a panicked, hurt look. I stumble backwards and hit the wall. His green eyes pierce into my deepest secrets. I run out the door as my ears start to ring. The doctors rush in.
"CAS! No! I need Cas!" I hear Dean's voice yell. I run down the hallways hitting almost everything. I run out the emergency door and to the park across the street. My knees give out and I slide to a stop on grass. I fall down crying so hard I can barely breath. I lay on the grass breathing unevenly. I control my breathing and stand up. I look back to the room Dean is in on the second floor. The window shatters and something flies out the window. It falls to the ground and shatters. Several more things fly out.
"Cas!" I hear Dean yell again. I calmly walk back up to the room. The doctors are holding the door shut.
"Let me in." I demand. They open the door and I walk in. They shut it quickly after me. The room is virtually empty. They removed everything. Dean is the only thing in the room. He is curled in the corner crying in a white t-shirt and white sweat pants. He keeps repeating,
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." And rocking back and forth. His arm is bloody. He ripped the IV out. I cringe at the thought of ripping sharp spikes out of my arm.
I think about walking over and comforting him. But instead I force myself to sit in the opposite corner.
"Cas. I love you. I need you. I'm sorry." I listen to him sob into his arm.
"I need you too." I whisper. Dean jerks violently again staring at me.
"You left." He says, tears streaming down his cheeks.
"I came back." I say.
"Why'd you leave?" He half yells.
"I was scared." I say. I look back to his face. He must have been way more scared. Needles in his arms. A mask over his face. Beeping things all around him. Then me. Promising not to leave him, I ran out. I didn't look back. I ran.
"I'm sorry, Dean." I say.
"Never leave me like that again." He says coughing. I crawl across the floor and pull him into my arms.
"I promise you, Dean Winchester, I will never leave you, ever again." I say.
"I love you." He says.
"I love you too." I whisper. I help him up and put my arm around him. He leans against me limping. I open the door and all the doctors back away quickly.
"I'm sorry." Dean says looking at the floor shyly.
"It's alright. You were just scared." The nurse says. Dean nods. I lead him out of the hospital and we walk home. I lay with him on his bed until he falls asleep and I just keep holding him until I fall asleep too.