fallen for the gang leader. (Kim namjoon x Min yoongi)

Jung hoseok

A/N: trigger warning! Eating disorder and mentions of self hatred

Hoseoks pov:

It's the next day. I wasn't able to sleep at all but namjoon is getting out in about 2 hours I trained for about 3 hours and danced for about 4 took a break for 2 hours and studied on my next target for a while before finally going downstairs to get some food and talk to the others.

"Hobi! Where were you?" Jimin got up from the couch and put his arm around me

"I was in my room "

"For 16 hours?"

"Yeah I was doing a lot of different things"

"Why don't you tell us while you eat."

"I'm not hungry thanks Jin"

"Eat." I turned around and saw yoongi walking up from the basement with some blood on his hands

"I'm not hungry yoongi"

"You didn't eat last night or today so get your ass to the table and eat the food Jin made for you"

"Fine" I walked to the dining table and sat down. Jin put the food in front of me. It looked good but I really don't have an appetite.

"You need to eat hobi" Jin said and he sat next to me

"I'm not hungry.." I mumbled

"You haven't eaten. You're working yourself to death"

"I don't want to talk about it Jin..."

"Hoseok. Meet with me in my office when you're done eating. and ONLY when you're foods gone"

"Yes sir..." Yoongi walked to his office and I pushed the food around the plate. I mean I can eat it then throw it up right? Yeah I'll do that... I started eating and I looked over to see Jin smiling. When I finished I put the plate in the sink and walked to the room yoongi is in. I knocked on the door and heard a small come in. I walked in and shut the door behind me

"Sit down "

"Did I do something wrong?"

"Sit. I need to talk to you" his voice was intimidating.. it was kind of like a growl. I sat down and he grabbed my hand. I flinched a little bit but kept it there

"Care to explain why you haven't been eating much?"

"I just haven't been hungry lately " he scanned my face for a second and intertwined our hands

"Hobi I'm not stupid. What's going on? You're not taking care of yourself " his facial expression was soft as well as his voice. I know I can trust him so why is it so hard to say it

"I'm sorry yoongi."

"Hobi you can talk to me. I won't be mad. I promise " tears filled the corner of my eyes.

"I hate my body... I'm fat... I need to stop eating and work out more... If I eat I have to throw it up before it digests... I just want to love myself like how you guys do..." Tears were streaming down my face yoongi wiped them with his thumbs.

"Hoseok... You're not fat... You're perfect in every way. You have a good body but an even better personality. And you need food to live. You can't keep this up. It's killing you and you're one of the best people I know.. all of us would be heartbroken if you ended up dead. And please stop locking yourself in your room. I tried coming in earlier but it was locked. You were training weren't you?"

"I was doing a lot..."

"Just keep the door unlocked so me and the others can always check up on you. I'm going to be watching you and making sure you're having proper meals. And not overworking yourself. You are perfect the way you are... Please talk to me or one of the other members when you're feeling this way" I nodded and he let go of my hand