elliot lee -- the boy with the loud laugh and the stars in his eyes.
micah cassidy -- the boy who's always got his earbuds in to drown out the world.
micah and elliot fell in love in the ninth grade. they've been best friends since way before that...
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I have Elliot for approximately a week after the last day of school before he will go to stay with his dad. We watch movies, hang out at the mall, go for bike rides, and a dozen other things.
It all feels awfully bittersweet. Summer always does for me, a love/hate relationship that I've never been able to properly explain out loud.
The air is warm and sticky, and melted ice cream drips down my arms, as Elliot and I sit out on his front porch on the last night. We're sharing a pair of headphones, but the music stopped a long time ago and now the silence engulfs us instead.
I don't know how late it is, my perception of time fading the longer we sit there. I pull my knees to my chest, breathing in the warm night air.
Unfortunately, the streetlights block out all the stars. Still, I want to bottle this moment and keep it in my pocket. With Elliot, I'm noticing there is rarely a moment I don't want to keep safe in my heart.
"Hey, Micah?" Elliot asks after a while.
"Yeah?" I ask in return, the words coming out barely above a whisper. I blink a few times more than necessary, trying to stop my head from spinning.
"I'm going to miss you."
"You say that every year." I try to joke. It's different this year, though. It feels different every year as we continue to grow. This year, after everything that has happened, it feels especially difficult.
"I mean it every year." He meets my eyes. "I mean it this year."
My heart jumps to my throat.
"I'm going to miss you too. Summer is going to be awfully boring once you're gone."
He laughs. I laugh. It's so easy to laugh with him, even when we're sad. That's why I decide not to tell him just how much I'll miss him— because you can only laugh through so much sadness before it overwhelms you, and I'm scared this is our limit.
"I'll text you, like, all the time though!"
I wish that was enough. I wish talking with him was enough. It used to be enough, but now I can't imagine going so long without hearing his voice, seeing his face, meeting his eyes and laughing until we can't breathe. After the dance, I can't imagine being separated from him long enough to forget the lilt of his lips when he smiles.
"You better call me, Lee. That's the least you can do." My laugh cracks down the middle, turning into a sob.
Elliot pulls me into a hug. "Of course."
☆ ☆ ☆
In the morning, my mom comes to pick me up.
I say another goodbye to Elliot, this one far less emotional as I bite my tongue to keep the tears in, and our parents share a few words before mom leads me out to the car.
I turn back and wave at him, but I can only take so much. The look on his face is practically gut wrenching, and I hop into the passenger seat of the car, turning the volume of the radio up.
That's when I finally let the tears go, crying all the way home. It's not easy to be separated from your best friend.
Just as I predicted, the rest of summer is really boring. Or maybe it's just empty, devoid of the laughter that usually keeps me afloat.
