Strange (Rosé x fem reader)

Chapter 9: Talks...Lots of Talks

After she mentioned that I couldn't help but think the worst. What if she's cheating on me? Found someone better, someone, who makes her happier, who listens...

I scoffed in disgust at myself, I've never been bothered about what I can and can't do especially because I couldn't help it, it wasn't my choice to be born like this.

She left the room and I thought she had left me again, she likes to make me feel all of these different emotions and leave. Leave me here alone to fill my head with insecure thoughts I didn't need.

But I was able to hear shuffling things around the kitchen, and I had to make sure it was her. I grabbed my phone that was about to die sooner or later and sent her a message, "Are you still here? Is that you making noise?" And the thought of it being someone else made my heart raise into painful palpitations.

I took a slow seat on the right side of my bed fidgeting with my fingers as the terrifying thoughts terrorized my head. What if it's not her? What if it's him? Coming to finish the job?

The fact that the message went unanswered didn't relax an ounce of my body. Before I could do anything her lean body appeared again entering my room with two tea cups.

"I thought you left! I thought someone else was here! I thought he was here! I sent you a text—" She quickly moved to set the cups on my vanity and rushed to me who was clearly showing distress.

"I'm," no more apologizing please, I begged in my head, "I didn't see the text, I- I didn't leave I'm here you're safe, I'm here." She hugged me and whispered into my ear, and I heard everything so clearly. Am I really safe though? She probably came to break my heart—officially— and she has the audacity to tell me I'm safe?

I pushed the girl off of me not knowing what to do with myself, or where to run to but I didn't want to be a hypocrite. What would I look like being upset and then performing said actions I hated about the girl? I wouldn't be any better than her.

"Sit, drink the tea I made... it's going to take a while." I took the small cup from her, shakily bringing the gold rim to my lips, allowing the warmth to soothe me and waiting for the herbs to calm me down. The warmth slid down my throat and it felt marvelous. She made great tea, not too sweet and not too hot. It was perfect.

"The night when we had sex you made me feel wonderful—" at least my worry about not making her cum or satisfied was gone, "It was the best night of my life it like opened up something I never knew I was capable of feeling. You fell asleep before me and when I was about to fall asleep as well my phone buzzed and I received pictures of me arriving here. I was so afraid they'd do something that I felt no other option but to leave. I texted back and told them I'd be willing to do anything to keep it a secret and keep us safe. I didn't want it to get out not because I'm ashamed but because of your dream career, your restaurant is at stake too.

Somehow the company found out and they told me I had to break up with you and I didn't want to. I told them I would though and that's why I wasn't so... involved or reciprocating. That's why I was also really upset that you showed up at the concert but I had no right to react like that, especially not when you didn't know. I know what you're gonna say, 'You could've told me' and that's my other mistake and I just didn't want you to worry." She didn't want to break up and not telling me felt like we did. Now I was confused between wanting to go through this together and not wanting to be part of this because it was so difficult, for the both of us. If they found out she was seeing a woman people would eat her alive. I didn't want that to happen.

I set the cup down on my nightstand next to my phone, "I appreciate you telling me but I think it's too late Rosie. This is affecting me so much—us really... it was more difficult to deal with than what I had imagined. I would fight for us, I would but this is jeopardizing so much for you too. Your image could be ruined because of me and you deserve to live pursuing your career without the stress of someone else."