𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 | y.itadori x reader

41.

Yuji was growing more impatient by the day, every day that went by without you with him hurt felt like it was well and truly hurting his soul. He never thought he'd be capable of feeling this way.

There was one night where he did go and sleep in your room, he had sat on your bed clutching the sheets like he had with your shirt and imagined it was you he was holding in his embrace. Nobara had called him a coward for it but he'd never miss the times she'd be looking at photos you both had taken together. It was like you had passed away, at least the grief he was experiencing felt like something similar. He would compare it to when his grandfather had passed away, thinking of how he had dealt with the mourning then.

"Yuji?" Gojo asked, pushing his shoulder lightly. Your teacher had grown somewhat soft towards them after the incident, and somehow it only made them all feel worse. Megumi was standing next to him, holding what looked like a piece of paper neatly folded in his hands.
"Why can't we visit her?" Itadori blurted out, clenching his fists that were stored in his pockets so that no one could see. They all turned towards him slowly and incredulous that he actually asked that after what they had been told by Nanami.
"I'm keeping her location private for her sake but also yours-"
"We're mourning someone who's not dead though, this isn't fair on any of us."
"Grow up Itadori Yuji, the world isn't fair, you knew what you were all getting into the moment you agreed to be a part of Jujutsu Tech. You will see your loved ones die, you will experience grief again many more times in this life."
"(Y/n) didn't choose this life and you know that." Nobara agreed completely with the argument Yuji was upholding but she didn't want to put your life further at risk. If them grieving you in this moment meant you could live to experience more, then she was happy sitting with her emotions for the time being.

Despite knowing how much it had affected Yuji, and despite never have experiencing what he was going through- she was empathetic of his situation. He would go to her in tears, crying out his heart and bearing it for her to see whenever his emotions overwhelmed him. It wasn't easy, but something she was more than happy to do if it meant bringing him a moment of comfort. "Yuji stop. Please." She implored, giving him a pleading look with her eyes. Arguing about a matter that was in no way going to resolve itself instantly was a waste of time and emotions. Especially this one. He looked at her with a gaze of disbelief, she wasn't defending him and he didn't understand why- and she wasn't in a position to explain right now.

They had all grouped up because Gojo had called them out for a briefing. "Thank you Kugisaki, despite everything you all believe is going on individually all I can do is reassure you she's ok. As ok as she can be in the state I found her." Yuji could feel his anger rising, "She's currently going through rehabilitation, but she will be back as soon as we have the get go from the higher-ups. And that's not promised unfortunately. Now! For the briefing..."

Yuji didn't listen to another word he said, his thoughts consumed once again by imagery of whatever state you could be in. Whether it be the worst possible or least. He glanced over at Megumi to see the same glazed over expression in his eyes, understanding that he too was not present.

"You know I miss you whenever you're away on a mission." You were laid on his chest, chin propped up comfortably as you looked him in his eyes. His expression softened and he reached out to stroke your face. You burrowed your face in his hand and gave it a light peck, letting a smile spread out on your face afterwards. Yuji could help but look at you, it seemed like everything he could ever possibly want in life was laying on him. Nothing mattered, only you.
"You do?" He asked, replying to what you had just told him.
"Of course I do, whenever I get to see you it feels like I'm safe. It sounds silly saying it like that because I feel safe with Nobara and Megumi, but with you it's different. It's like a feeling I can't describe fully in words, silly right?"
"Why would it be silly?" He replied once again with with a questions, trying to process what you were saying so that he could understand how you felt.
"I dunno, I guess I just haven't felt this before." You reached your arms out and squeezed his cheeks in between them affectionately. Yuji didn't know how to reply, no one had ever told him that before. Before it was him and his high-school friends, there had never been any chemistry between them that could match. He smiled, that's all he felt like doing in that moment.

"Is there something you find amusing Itadori?" Gojo asked, snapping him out of his memory. Yuji shook his head and felt the smile, that he didn't even know had been on his lips, disappear. "Hmm."
"I don't think I can do this today Gojo." He replied to his teacher, who shot him a look of confusion before it melted into one of empathy.
"Ok, it's just a few lower-grade curses. Megumi and Kugisaki can handle it right guys?!" The two looked over at their classmate and nodded, Kugisaki gave him a little side hug and Megumi placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

-*-

The bed you were on was growing more uncomfortable by the minute, but the fact that you still weren't able to put any weight onto your legs meant that for the time being the only thing you could do was stay put. Nanami had visited briefly while you were doing your rehabilitation, making sure everything was ok and that you were making good progress. It felt useless though, you didn't feel like anything was changing and the doctors had informed you that due to the lack of that, it could be possible that the bones would never be strong enough to uphold your weight.

You closed your eyes, imagining Yuji was holding your hand and reassuring you as you went through the pain, but you knew that when you'd open your eyes- the imagery that you'd so vividly created in your head would vanish, and you'd be reminded of the painful reality of the situation. There had been moments where you'd wanted to run away, it wasn't that you weren't grateful, it was that every day that passed reminded you of how unwell you were.

There was a garden where you were staying, they had taken you out there once to look at the blooming flowers as an attempt to improve your mood so that maybe your motivation could assist your recovery. They had even given you a little camera so that you could take photos of them, you told yourself to show Yuji when you got better.

Gojo had told you that he'd bring them when you were able to walk, as a little prize. If you were able to walk you'd be less at risk- was his reasoning behind this. You knew it had been another attempt to motivate you, which was even more detrimental, but you appreciated the concern greatly. Him and Nanami had been the only two to visit, you father had not been seen. Gojo had also woefully informed you that he had been told of the incident, but refused to see you. In all honesty it didn't surprise you, after all these years and other injuries it wasn't taking you aback that he didn't have time to see you. You refused to make excuses for him, like you had when you were younger when he didn't come to see you.

"I hope the flower I picked him is still intact."