Highway to your Heart || Haechan ||

twenty three

Donghyuck woke up in the middle of the night from the nightmare that suddenly decided to return after years and torture him.

He rubbed his eyes while the memories of the past still replayed in his head, the mocking and teasing of his classmates, the snickers of the parents who found him ugly and the constant comparing to his older sister.

Sighing exhaustedly he stood up to drink some water and check what ungodly hour it was, groaning at his watch that showed a little past 4am, way too early to start the day.

Laying back into bed he turned towards the wall and hugged the plush cat that he slept with while closing his eyes and hoping to get rid of the negative thoughts plaguing his mind and disrupting his rest.

It was easy feeling for Iseul when she talked about not wanting to be ridiculed since he went trough it, majority of his kindergarden and early school days reminding him of that fact.

Children are cruel when you're different, they tease you for having darker skin, for having a high pitched voice, for being chubby, for being hyperactive or for being smarter than them, especially at the beginning of puberty.

But parents are worse in Donghyuck's opinion.

As a child he was very extroverted and befriended everyone, being a magnet for other kids and popular because of his outgoing personality, and the boy loved the constant company.

He was just happy when his friends' parents wanted him on pictures as well and interpreted it as them liking him too, thinking that all the suggestions of him wearing more sunscreen and to go out less under the sun were out of worry.

Donghyuck was seven when he realized that his presence on the pictures of his classmates was to make them look better and seem fairer, something that Korean parents valued far more than character it seemed.

Starting school all those words that were directed towards him with an intention to hurt him finally got trough the boy, not being able to brush them off as silly comments or goodhearted advice.

And then there was his older sister too. The perfect looking child in the eyes of every Korean parent and the polar opposite of him. With fair skin, a slim figure, large eyes, plump lips, jet black hair and a calm personality she was the idol of their school.

Compared to her Hyuck was chubby, tanned, had unruly curly hair, had a loud and annoying high pitched voice, never payed attention in class and loved causing trouble. 

In the eyes of the people the two siblings were polar opposites and nobody shied away from comparing the two and complaining to the boy why he couldn't be more like his sister.

If people were a little less blind and judging they could have spotted the striking similarity between the two siblings, their striking beauty and how much they had indeed looked alike aside from their golden hearts and unmatched intelligence.

Donghyuck always had kids around himself yet he felt more alone than ever, becoming reckless and ignoring the fact that he too was just a child with feelings that could be hurt.

At the age of thirteen he met Mark and Johnny, the two guys who just moved back to Korea and had no absurd beauty standards or ridiculous expectations for calling someone their friend, accepting Hyuck the way he was and teaching him self love.

Ever since then the older had his back whenever someone decided to pick on him while Mark stayed by his side as his classmate and later roommate as well.

Sometimes he wondered what would have been if he didn't get to meet the guys, if he had to spend five more years like that until escaping that place to attend university. 

Would he have followed his dream and passion?

Would he have held out at all?

Would he have met the rest of his friends, Jisung, Iseul?

Donghyuck sighs again and checks his watch to see that it's been two hours since his brain decided to reminisce those days, missing his parents and sister who always supported him and stood up against the others to protect their little bear.

Kicking his blanket aside he shuffles to the small bathroom attached to their dorm room to wash his face and get ready for the day, deciding to grab a coffee at the cafe nearby and just watch people since there was no use in trying to fall asleep now.

He would probably regret the sleepless night later when he ends up dozing off in professor Kim's class and barely succeeds waking up and avoiding  punishment, but it's not the first time and surely not the last.

For now he quietly leaves the dorm to avoid waking Mark up and forces his mind to think about something brighter, something more recent like a pair of mismatched high tops, soft oversized sweaters and a pair of expressive eyes.