Secret Confessions (Book 1)

Alastor

"He's fine. Just being dramatic." Even though my tone is nonchalant, my stomach twists with the irksome feeling of worry. Using the toe of my bloody shoe, I prod at the spider's still form. "You can stop pretending, Angel dear."

I poke harder at his side, worry giving way to panic. The process of a contract with another being broken and a new one sealed is quite painful, but I didn't know just how painful until now. It will physically rip your soul in twine, transferring a part of your soul to the one you made a deal with. Giving them full access to do anything with you. Force you to do a favor, cause you excruciating pain, anything really. All it takes is a firm hand around that small bit of your soul, puppeteering you as they wish.

In this case, the one holding the strings would be me.

If Angel passed out from the pain, then it must be very painful indeed.

"He's not moving!" Charlie wails from where she crouches at his side.

"Dramatic thing, isn't he?" I muse, my smile widening to cover the inner panic that threatens to bleed through my steel façade.

"I don't know darling, he seems pretty out of it." Rosie exclaims, leaning against the doorway of the kitchen, an eyebrow raised.

Without breaking eye contact with her, I quietly lift my hand, summoning a bright glowing light in my palm. Hot pink and radiating surprising warmth, the small portion of Angel's soul beats like a heart against my silk glove.

Angel gets to keep the rest of his soul, but this tiny bit is mine. A part of me until I say otherwise. Curling my fingers over the pulsing soul, it dims and fades away just in time as Charlie snaps her head up to look at me.

"We have to do something!" She yells and my ears twitch back at the harsh noise.

"He'll be fine, my dear. I shall take him to his room to rest and when he wakes, you can ask him what happened." I reply and crouch next to her to press two fingers to Angel's neck, checking to see if he truly is okay. A hidden method to calm the stabbing shards of panic gutting me. It takes sheer force of will not to heave a sigh of relief at the fluttering of his pulse. To not give away an ounce of worry in my expression.

When Angel wakes, if he wants to reveal the contract between us, it's his choice. Now that the deal is done and binding, he may tell whomever he chooses.

Rosie stares at me with wide eyes after revealing Angel's soul, and I peer over Charlie's head at her, finger coming up to press against my lips. A secret among friends... for now.

Vagatha breezes into the kitchen with a damp rag, no doubt meant for Angel, and I reach up to snatch it from her hands.

Without another word, I gather Angel into my arms and leave the kitchen, ignoring the hushed whispers of Charlie and Vagatha.

Arriving in Angel's room, I lay him under the covers and tuck him in gently. I sit on the edge of the bed, gazing down at the fluffy menace that occupies my every thought.

What is it about this spider that drives me so crazy? Why do I melt with every touch? Why does every heated look from those monochrome eyes make me want to do something questionable?

In a way, Angeldust almost reminds me of... him. My wild flower. My Anthony.

It's been so long, I almost forgot what he looked like... but I can kind of see him in Angel's features.

Laughing blue eyes and dancing blonde hair invade my thoughts and I hunch over, clutching my head with a small whimper.

No!

I can't think about him. I won't!

Jumping up, I hurry from the room, leaning heavily on the deep red wallpaper of the hallway. Looking around to see no one, I slowly reach into my breast pocket and shakily pull out a golden ring with a pink diamond in the middle.

A momento from my human life. A painful reminder of what could've been.

I carry it around with me as a way to keep some part of Anthony alive.

My fingers wrap around the cold metal and I look over my shoulder at Angel's room with a sigh before pocketing the ring, straightening with a wide fake smile, and heading downstairs.

Sure, I care for the spider. But part of my heart will always belong to Anthony. And no matter who I develop feelings for, I will never be able to love another the way I loved my wild flower.

                   ~~~~~~~~~~~~

Author's Note:

Hey guys! So I know this chapter is short, but I'm super busy with deadlines for my other books and I'm doing my best to edit them, write chapters for this fan fic, and promote my preorder. I apologize for the slow updates and I promise the next chapter will be longer!