Addict

Part Five- Sam, Again

I feel like the hurt from missing her is taking over actually. I mean, I see her so often. How could I forget what we had? Everything we shared. It can't be possible for her not to miss it. I do. So much. It was the best time of my life. I don't think her feelings are gone. But it's not my place to analyze who she loves I guess. Sometimes, I wish things were different, well, we all do I'm sure, but I wish she knew what she meant to me.

I'm staying at her house for another night, but Natasha won't be there, she's in Ohio with family. Which, I'm not gonna lie, is perfect. Maybe if I can get her to recognize her feelings, I might get her back. My life back. That sounds shitty though. Doesn't it? It would be silly for me to say that I don't want her to leave Natasha for me, because I do. More than anything. We are meant to be together. I see the way Natasha treats her. She constantly threatens to break up with her, she yells at her for being her basically. My Sam doesn't deserve that. The walk to Sam's house is only maybe ..five hundred feet? But it's tedious. Because I know I'm gonna have to look the love of my life in the eyes, hug her, and then pull away before kissing her like I used to. I rehearse my hello in my head the whole time, tying to figure out the best way to prevent myself from embarrassment in front of her. If we were together, k wouldn't have to try, she'd love the quirky me, but this is different, I gotta get my baby back.

I knocked on her door, and she answered. Being the same perfect Sam she always was. With her two foot long wavy hair going down to the dimples in her back, her straight teeth, tan skin, skinny figure, but holy shit curvy. She's gorgeous. Maybe I'm just too ugly for her?

She greeted me, and all the worrying was pointless. It was natural, I hugged her, butt she held on longer than normal, and I was in heaven. I laughed and shook my head.
"You're cute." She said.
Way to fuck with my mind. This is a tease. I'm in love with this girl, who is in a relationship, but thinks I'm "Cute." Shoot me. Why does she have to be so indecisive? I can live with it though. I felt the butterflies. The same ones I got when she used to whisper "I love you" in my ear. Something is different tonight.

So Sam and I talked and talked and talked. She told me she wants to leave Natasha. Because the relay was toxic, and anymore, it's mor elf a chore than a choice. In my head I was dancing, but my body was holding hers, comforting her, wiping away the tears that came with the reasons Natasha was hurting her. But the topic switched. We became happy. Talking about the things we've done together, reciting memories. But she said something to me. Something that made me want to cry.

"Kate, do you still love me?"
I felt a pit form in my stomach. My heart dropped. I burst. If only she knew. These past two years of addiction have been me, getting over her. Needing her to feel whole.
"Sam, I never stopped loving you. I miss you. I miss us. What we shared. You're all I think about. You're all I want. I hate living without you. You were my love."
Her tears came.

We just sat and explained the way we missed each other, and had the aching desire to be in love with one another. Apparently, Natasha was a cover up, a two year rebound. Sam wasn't over me. And while I was ecstatic, I felt bad for Natasha. Because anyone could love Sam (Not like I did, but still love) and I know what it's like to lose her. So even if Natasha hurt her, it was gonna hurt her back. Sam is special. Different from other people.
...

Sam broke up with her the next morning. And as soon as she hung up the phone, she kissed me. Just like before. We weren't dating, but the kiss was magic. It was like the relationship didn't end. I had my life back. She was mine. And I'm not losing her this time. Everything we had missed out on in those years felt full, my life suddenly didn't seem like hell. It was more than I could have dreamed of.

We didn't even ask each other out, we just became "Us" again. Sam and Kate. The way it's meant to be. We skipped school that day. And lay in her bed. I had my arms around her, and slept beside her. Bodies together. How this are supposed to be. She rolled over. Looked me in the eyes, rolled on top of me, and kissed. She looked like a goddess, and in the moment, the world was us, me admiring what I have. Her.

To sum it up, we had sex. Making up for the things we didn't have. I would go into detail, but it was special, something I want with her, and it's no one else's love story. Plus all I'd hear a I is how it was too soon, but there's history. It's only two years overdue.

So I think ill stay with her more often. Which is how I like it. I don't plan for this to happen so fast. But I'm glad it did. She can't get hurt anymore. Not one mare day of faking. Our forever continues...

Now.