seventeen

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I hope you all still like the story<3 

I've edited it and I'd recommend reading all of it before starting here:)

Thank you for still supporting me after I left babes<3 it means so much to me:(

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y/n

The car took a sudden stop as Billy pressed onto the brakes, my head flung forward and hit the headrest again when the car stood still.

"Are you trying to get me pissed?" He asked

"Cause you're just always around other guys Y/N." He continued

"HE WENT TO ME BILLY." I yelled, he shook his head not believing me.

"You stay away from him, you understand me?" He asked as he grabbed my arm.

Before I had time to respond he walked out off the car, he lit up a cigarette and walked towards a bench. The moonlight was the only thing giving us sight.

I went after him and sat down next to me.

"Billy please, " I tried to speak but Billy cut me off,

"Don't Y/N." He said 

"You're the only one that can fucking hurt me." He continued, "And you keep on doing it." He scoffed.

"Billy I never meant to hurt you." I said, it was true.

"YOU'RE MY FUCKING GIRLFRIEND." He yelled, to which I did not respond.

We sat there together, not saying a word. My head was leaning on his shoulder and his arm was around me.

Billy

I never thought I'd regret being with Y/N, I should have never let myself have these feelings, these cravings. I fucking hated myself, and yet I couldn't push her away.

I was not supposed to care and she was the only thing stopping me from doing so. I hated being weak, she had me thinking about her every single day and she did not care.

My jealous and obsessive behavior was all because of her and because of this I would never be able to love her in the way that she deserved, simple because I did not know how to.

My head was starting to hurt, sitting here with her gave me peace, just the two of us, no one here to bother us. No Eddie or Theo here to ruin things.

"I know sweetheart." I said, I'd always forgive her, no matter what she did.

But that did not stop me from caring for her, everything that I knew about love is that it fucking sucked. My mom left me, so that wasn't real love, what Neil and I had was not love. Nothing in my life ever was. And I did not care for it, the only one I ever needed was myself, and that had worked for me the past 18 years. 

I couldn't give Y/N love, the only thing I could give her was pain, I didn't want to admit that to myself. Because that meant losing her.

"You wanna sleep at my place tonight?" She asked me

I wanted to, I really did. But I knew that the more time I spent with her the harder I fell. And those were the feelings I shouldn't feel.

I didn't answer her and she did not ask again.

y/n

"We should go." He said as he stood up, he held my hand and pulled me with him to the car.

I was admiring the stars during the ride, not knowing what Billy was thinking about.

"Did you know that stars only look like they blink because of the earth's atmosphere?" I asked while still admiring them.

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