(ok so, this one is very personal to me, but still contains stannarrator content. its also super short and i apologize so feel free to skip oki bye)
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The rain tapped against the window as I shifted in bed. It was the third time this week I had trouble sleeping.
After laying in bed for a few more minutes, I decided it would be best if I got up. I slowly pulled myself out of bed, and walked into the kitchen.
As I started making a cup of coffee, I started to think. My thoughts started to lose control. My mind drifted, and I started to panic. Once it starts, it can't be stopped.
"Fuck," I whispered to myself. My anxiety was rising, and I was starting to breathe heavily.
Thoughts of them lingered in my mind. Those I have relied upon for everything, and I've given nothing in return. Every single one of them, there and gone without a trace.
Well, almost.
There are a few who have stuck around, and others who occasionally visit. But right now....
He was here. Of course it had to be him, he did the most damage. God, I loved everything about him; his calloused hands, his silky voice, his soft hair.
Every memory of him returned to painfully greet me. The times we spent laughing in the office. The day he was finally freed from his world.
The day....
I told him how I felt....
Everything is.... fuzzy..... after that.
Yelling,
Crying,
Screaming.
Everything hit me at that moment, causing me to inhale a sharp breath.
"I can't keep doing this," I shuddered, "I just can't."
I held onto the counter with all I had. I felt my legs weaken, and my vision blurred. I sank to the floor, resisting the tears forming.
I took in a few shaky breaths, "Come on, pull yourself together."
"Yourself?"
"oh god..."
"Who even are you? You've lived so many lives, in so many realities. You've met person after person, simulating your experience.
"You've become different people to please them, and yet you still fail. You fail over and over again. And what is left? After all that has happened?
"Nothing. You've become an empty vessel. You are no longer. All you do is hold the identity of others within you, harboring them until they are of no use. You discard those who are not worthy to make room for others.
"You pretend it's all going to be okay. Let's face it, it's not. Nothing will ever be okay. And you are too powerless to stop it.
"There is nothing you can do to fix the damage you have done."
Tears rolled down my cheeks as I shook on the floor. I curled into a ball, hoping to shield myself.
No one was coming to save me. I knew it. I had no one to hold my hand anymore. No one to guide me in the right direction.
The training wheels had been removed. I have to navigate life by myself.
But,
I can't.
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THE END IS NEVER THE END IS NEV-
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I opened my eyes.
Are you fucking serious?
Of course it was a dream, it always is.
Just fucking delightful.
I got out of bed and walked into the living room to see Stanley and the Narrator asleep on the couch. A small smile spread across their faces. I sighed.
"At least they're free," I assured myself.
"That's all that matters."
"Right?"
END
(can you tell i need therapy yet?)
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Stanarrator Oneshots 🪣™
Fanfic⚠️TW!!!!!⚠️: Oneshots may contain mentions of suicide and strong language (haha funny bad words) Unfortunately, I'm unable to come up with a good storyline ever, so here are some oneshots for all you lovely gays 💅✨🏳️🌈 Please take this Reassuranc...