Spinning Out

Chapter 23

JAINA

His lips leave mine but it still takes a moment for my eyes to open. His phone is insistent, one notification after another. He smiles at me apologetically and retrieves it from his pocket. The interruption has broken the spell and I'm not sure if I should move away and give him space to answer, or wait and hope that we can fall back under it. In the end, I'm not that brave. I step over to my desk and shuffle items while he handles whatever business he has.

"I'm sorry," he says distractedly.

"It's fine," I tell him.

I lean against the desk and watch as he types quickly. I'm curious who might be in such a need of his attention. I know it's not my business though, so I would never ask.

"I have to go," he says. His brows are drawn together slightly and his jaw clenches at the end of his statement. I can feel the shift in his mood clearly.

"Everything ok?" I ask. My feet move forward, my arms crossing over my body as I wait for his response.

"Umm," he says slowly.

His eyes don't meet mine again, they are fixed on his phone screen. Now my curiosity is drawing me in. His hand lifts to his head, his fingers rubbing absently at his temples. Then just as quickly, he's tapping on the screen again.

"Sorry," he finally starts, "it's my best friend. He's kind of a mess. It's a long story. I think I need to go see him."

"Of course," I say.

"I'm just not sure how I can go see him. He's not local and I have stuff at the shop my dad needs me around for," he tells me. His eyes bolt around my room as if he's trying to think of a solution to the problem. I don't think he will find it on my walls, but I understand that feeling of helplessness when everything in your life feels like some impossible puzzled you are trying to put together.

Elijah's hand now scratches at his chin. He stares down at the phone in his hand and sighs. "I might be gone for a day or two. I promise I'll get back to helping you when I get home. Please be careful if you try to go without me."

"I will."

He slips his phone into his back pocket and for the first time since he received the messages, I feel like I have his full attention again. He reaches for me, tugging me to where he is. His lips press to my forehead.

"Thank you. I had a good time tonight," he says.

"Me too. Go to your friend. I'll be ok."

If anyone understands the need to be by your friend during a hard time, it's me. I'm jealous that he can actually talk to his bestie. I'd love to get a notification from Nathan. I'd give anything to have the opportunity to go sit and talk things out with him. Instead, I'll wake up tomorrow and find myself in the parking lot at the hospital, once again waiting for visiting hours.

I walk Elijah back to the front door. The block outside is cold and quiet. He hesitate for a second before stepping out. He's not in a rush to leave me, but I know he is feeling the pull to go. I've been living between two worlds since the accident. At times I want to stay firmly rooted in one. I'll be having dinner with my parents, laughing about something they've said and for the slightest of seconds, in that world the accident doesn't exist. It's as if I can just run outside and knock on his door. While Elijah is here, he isn't involved in whatever his friend is dealing with. However, it's only a step away—a step in the other direction—a step outside this very door.

I watch him hustle to his car. The roar of that old engine cuts through the night and I almost expect lights to go on as people look to see where the sound is coming from. They wouldn't have time to see, however, because he's at the end of the block before I can get my arm up to wave goodbye.